Awkward Zoom Conference Moments to Avoid this Winter

Happy New Year, Hoyas! Coming back to campus can be hard with a whole new season of classes, clubs and dodging rats, but sometimes the Old Gods of Georgetown feel that pain and grace us with the desperately needed ~snow day~.


That being said, all our joy can be taken away in one fell swoop with killjoy policy of “Instructional Continuity” and its chief agent: the Zoom Conference.

So, while we hope our snow days remain snow days, here are some awkward moments to avoid while using the bootleg version of Google Hangouts.

Sneezing obnoxiously

Folks, for the love of John J. DeGioia, mute your mics if you ain’t talking.

One of the most criminal occurrences while discussing the minutia of literary criticism is getting a front-row seat to an ear-piercing jet stream of mucus. While the winter season can bring us some childlike fun and top-tier snow selfies, everybody gets sick at some point.

Even so, no one wants to see how sick you are.

Eating aggressively front and center

Everyone knows that snow doesn’t just stop classes. It disrupts the whole infrastructure of the well-oiled machine that is Georgetown University. Leo’s can potentially be inaccessible (blessing in disguise??), which means scrounging for whatever leftovers or unhealthy snack foods you have stocked.

Hunger, sickness, cold and laziness all work together to make any meal you have just so gross. Don’t get caught munching on the oddly shaped apple or unnecessarily wet Epi quesadilla.

#BlockDatCam #MuteDatMic

Recording uncomfortable yelling in a public place

Why anyone would want to “Educational Facetime” their History professor in the chaotic throes of HFSC is a mystery to all of us. Overhearing “weekend plans at Vil A” while discussing the Khmer Rouge is definitely one of the most uncomfortable experiences known to man.

Find a quiet place to conduct this most awkward of educational tools and don’t submit your classmates to hearing things they could die, live and die again without ever hearing.

Unexpected roommate entrances

They say that communication is the most important part of any relationship, especially when living with someone.

So, when everyone ends up trapped in the same building for 12+ hours, it’s pretty important to communicate if you have some necessary and graded online conference you need some space for.

If not, one could, let’s say, capture their roommate yelling some obscenity from some song they’re just really into right now. OR, catching them right after they come back from a good ol’ shower.

Both are pretty bad. Trust us.

Having your professor call on you only to realize you joined the call and immediately turned off your camera and mic and left

No one wants to be there. Not even your professor. Literally, everyone involved would rather be doing anything else.

But desperate times call for desperate measures, and, sometimes, you gotta do what you gotta do. So, don’t get caught ditching, not only by the person who controls your grades, but by all the equally tired and lazy people who are choosing to tough it out.

They will have their revenge.

Not knowing when to talk

Since the birth of modern education, classroom participation has revolved around the “raising of the hand.” But when that fundamental function is robbed from you, how are you supposed to do that thing that counts from 25 to 35 percent of your final grade???

Some have taken to awkwardly jumping in, squeaking out a weird noise, coughing, or just screaming to claim their place.

There’s no solution to this one. Sometimes, you just gotta fight for what’s yours.

Just looking real gross in your dorm

It’s been three days. You stayed up until 4 a.m. for the last four days. You begged for a snow day and got one, but the universe spat on this blessing and gave you a 9 a.m. Zoom Conference for Intensive Spanish.

Not only do you look like Todd Olson after a noise complaint from the Georgetown neighborhood, but you’ve also lost all ability to speak your already rudimentary Spanish, much less the English you though you knew.

You literally haven’t showered in days and your last meal was a milkshake from Epi five hours ago when you went to bed.

Take care of yourselves.

Oof…

The semester has only just started, and it looks like this winter’s gonna be a long one.

So, while you should try your best to avoid these terribly awkward moments, you should do better and just take care of yourself.

In the end, we’re all just trying to make it to Georgetown Day.

What to Expect During Semi Formal Szn

In between the time of the turkey and the weeks of Michael Bublé and Mariah Carey Christmas carols, Georgetown celebrates another special season: Semi Formal Szn. Around this time, the Facebook notifications roll in, the online shopping begins, and the number of people getting hospitalized skyrockets.

With these many options of which formal to crash, our wallets are begging us to be selective. So, I’ll make it easy for you and summarize what to expect at each event:

Any Frat/Sorority

If you’ve never been to any of the Greek life semi formals, just pull up any video on Barstool’s Instagram page and you’ll get the picture. Girls will be taking photos everywhere, begging their dates to “take one with flash, one without and one with portrait mode.” The guys, of course, will be screaming jibberish at each other, lightly punching each other until it eventually turns into a spectacle of a public fistfight. Nonetheless, a good time!

GUES

Mini hot dogs and Red Bulls are not a great combination for the stomach. If you really pay attention, you can hear the attendees, 99 percent of whom are not even in GUES, complaining about the lack of food and eventually taking the late night trek to Epi (the pesto grilled cheese is underrated, by the way, so be sure to try that). Each semester, at least one person has needed to be ~escorted~ into an Uber back to campus, and you can bet that this year will be no different.

The Hoya

This will probably be the most sophisticated-trashy formal you’ll ever attend. Hoya members will gladly debate politics, compare their high school subject test scores and argue about which section of The Hoya is ‘better’ (s/o to “tHe BlOg DoEsN’t EvEn CoUnT!”). Basically, it’s the typical GPB basement party, but much classier (and less crowded)!

Couples at Leo’s

I still don’t know who runs the Couples at Leo’s Instagram account, but if you’re reading this, I love you (and thank you for following @picsofjennaeating #shamelessselfpromo). No one at this formal will bring (or have) a significant other, but that won’t stop them from ~classily~ sharing a beverage together at Hawthorne. The lucky stars who have been featured on @CouplesAtLeos will receive their deserved clout and moments of fame, as overexcited freshmen will scream, “You’re the one who played footsies!” or “Aren’t you the one who ate alone?”

The Corp

I don’t know why on earth people would pay $100 for a formal, but they better be willing to get their money’s worth out of a night at the Andrew M. Mellon Auditorium. Freshman girls will finally be able to rewear their prom dresses, only to realize how uncomfortable they truly were. It might be tough to convince your non-Corp friends as to why they should pay $100 for a ticket to one formal when they could just go to the three formals listed above for the same price, but you can at least send your family some wholesome and classy photos before you spend most of the night waiting in line for the fancy bathroom.

Formal szn can be overwhelming, but you should at least try to go to one for the experience. And if you go to all of them…how do you have the money, energy and liver for that?

Have fun, Hoyas.

 

Gif/Photo Sources: giphy.com, flashbak.com

Tips for Staying Warm This Winter

It’s officially winter, my fellow Hoyas*.  You know what that means: finals, Christmas and, of course, being freezing at all times.  Here are some tips and tricks from your friends at 4E to help you stay warm over the next few months:

*Yes, I know winter doesn’t officially start until December something, but when it starts getting dark outside before I’ve eaten lunch, I consider it winter and so should you. 

1. Invest in a Nice Jacket

I mean nice but not too nice. If you purchase either a Canada Goose or a Barbour, I can guarantee it will mysteriously “go missing” from a chair in the corner of some Henle party within a month — s/o to GUPD Chief of Police Jay Gruber.

2. Stop Drinking Iced Coffee.

It’s disgusting even when it’s actually hot outside. There is absolutely no reason to order iced coffee while wearing a scarf. Ice doesn’t belong in coffee. Just order it hot and stop being so weird.

3. Eat a Hot Chick From Wisey’s

Haha, get it? Because it’s “Hot.” Also, your stomach will hurt so badly afterward that you’ll forget all about how cold you feel!

4. Run (From the Rats on Campus)

There are So. Many. Rats. On. This. Campus. You’ll be plenty warm in no time once you start sprinting away from the ones that have started nesting directly outside your apartment!

5. Get a Significant Other

Cuffing Szn, amirite #ladies?  70 percent of Hoyas date other Hoyas!*

*and end things the minute it finally gets warm enough to darty again.

6. Ghost Everyone in Your Life Who Lives in Burleith.

In these frigid temperatures, it’s just not worth the walk. Sacrifices must be made.

7. Take a Bird Scooter Everywhere

The less time you have to spend outside, the better. To get where you’re going faster, Bird everywhere. Bird to class. Bird to Leo’s. Bird to Lau. Bird in Lau. The relatively high risk of accidentally “running into someone” or “getting run over by a car” is definitely worth cutting three minutes out of your commute.

P.S. If you Lime, Skip or — God forbid — Lyft anywhere on this campus, I hope you get stuck behind a slow walker on a narrow path.

8. Stop Going to Class.

You can’t get cold if you don’t go outside. Literally stop leaving your dorm/apartment/house for any reason. The semester is basically over anyway; you’ll be fine.

9. Start Smoking Cigarettes.

In light of the recent, shocking revelation that Juuls are bad for your health, try the fun alternative that looks cool, tastes great and, most importantly, keeps your fingers warm!*

*This is sarcasm. There are already way too many people contributing to the cloud of carcinogens I have to walk through before entering Lau each day. Please do not become one of them.

10. Stress-Cry.

Nothing warms your face faster than a steady stream of stress-induced tears. Finals season is right around the corner to help you out with this one.

Stay warm, Hoyas!

 

Sources: giphy.com, pinterest.com

An Ode to Finals Season

As the long-awaited Dec. 20 draws near, we here at 4E have prepared an ode to undoubtedly the merriest time of the year: FINALS SZN. Whether you’re reading this post in the sanctity of your own dearly missed home, at your ~unique~ vacation spot in Mexico or on the Hilltop waiting for your unfortunately-scheduled math final, we can relate to what you’re feeling:

So, without further ado, let’s all take a moment to reflect on Georgetown’s beloved stress culture, appreciate the ~high-quality~ Whisk coffee that has fueled us thus far and give ourselves a pat on the back for succeeding  doing relatively well surviving this semester!

After endless midterms, weeks of studying all night,

there’s a brief respite, then finals are in sight.

It seems like it’s always time to buckle down

but that’s just part of being at Georgetown

The struggle is real as you prep for Bib Lit —

but what can you expect from the Jesuits?

You’ve got 99 problems, the first is Of God,

and in time you’re exposed as a Catholic fraud.

In your first exam, those wretched blue books appear

and before too long, they’re stained with your tears.

You fight through hand cramps for two hours straight,

and from nine to eleven, your heart palpitates.

Lau 2 is love, Lau 2 is life —

just kidding, that place is a hellhole of strife.

You wonder, will these troubles ever be over?

It’s been awhile since you’ve been this sober.

You’ve studied forever, it seems like a time warp,

and while waiting at MUG, you curse the capitalist Corp.

Later that day, you procrastinate more:

It was feeling too lonely up on Lau 4.

You’re buried in books on a Saturday night —

to friends at state schools, it’s a pitiful sight.

It’s only midnight, but the future looks bleak.

You remind yourself, though, that sleep’s for the weak.

But when you finally get into the swing of things,

to no one’s surprise, Lau’s fire alarm rings.

So you make your way over to good ol’ Leavey —

should four flights of stairs really make you this wheezy?

Texts from your friends say they’re already on break,

but at least they’ll be free to attend your wake.

You’re struggling to find the will to survive,

indeed, you fall short of the expectation to thrive.

“How to learn French in a day,” you search online.

You’d forgotten “Bonjour”— probably not a good sign

After handing in your final subpar paper,

it looks like life’s finally turned in your favor.

Though GPA-wise, there may be reason to fear,

that’ll be a problem you save for next year.

The holidays will provide plenty of reason

for you to repress this finals season.

Walking past Healy, you take a pic and proceed,

“until next semester!” your Snapchat story reads.

Suitcase in hand, you feel an upswing in mood

at the thought of three weeks without Leo’s food.

You search for your Uber outside the front gates —

What’s taking so long? New Jersey awaits!

~Happy Hoyadays~ from all of us at 4E!

Photos/Gifs: giphy.com, tumblr.com

The 5 Stages of Winter Break

1. Relief

You’re Finally Done. Thank God. You made it through an entire semester of Bib Lit without ever actually opening a bible. You recognized more than a generous 50%  of the words on your Spanish exam. Was your final CPS essay good? Not really, but you met the word count, submitted it on time, and most importantly, you’ll never have to talk to your unreliable graduate-student TA ever again! So say goodbye to that Lau cubicle, shove some random clothes and your Juul charger into a duffel bag, and call an Uber to Union Station: it’s officially ~break~.

You, waving goodbye to the poor souls who still have to take a Sociology final

2.  Relaxation

Showering without flip-flops in a bathroom without black mold? Eating a meal that doesn’t involve ramen noodles or flamin’ hot cheetos? Stepping outside and not being greeted by at least a dozen large rats? They should call you King Felipe VI of Spain (G ’95), ‘cause this Hoya is living like royalty. You never knew you would miss suburbia this much. No imminent deadlines, stolen  borrowed quizlets, or panic attacks induced by SaxaNet. You have all the time in the world to lounge around the house, send snapchats of your dog, and debate whether or not it’s still ok to binge watch House of Cards (Editor’s note: It’s not. Stick to Friends. David Schwimmer is our last hope).

Not proofreading that final BlackBoard submission like

3. Remembrance

You meet up with your high school squad at the local Applebee’s and reminisce about Gonzaga   Delbarton your totally unique alma mater. At the wise old age of 20, you fondly look back at the shenanigans of your youth. Remember when you prank called your Calculus teacher? Remember when you stole a beer from your dad’s fridge in the basement? Remember when you said you had “senioritis” but actually continued to try very hard in school because you wanted to go to Georgetown? Haha! Good Times! You weren’t lame at all!

The AP Bio reunion is finna be ~lit~

4. Regret

Ok, it’s been a week and you’ve realized why you were so eager to leave home in the first place. There are no Ubers or places that stay open past 10 pm here. Your parents have an incessant need know where you’re going, who you’re going with, and “is there going to be alcohol there?”. And when you do go out, you have to constantly remind people that you go to Georgetown, not GW and then pretentiously explain why THEY ARE VERY DIFFERENT SCHOOLS. You miss procrastinating on Lau 2 with your friends. You miss saying hi to The Wisey’s Rat. You even find yourself missing New Leo’s (not really, but we’ll pretend for the sake of this article). It’s officially time to go back to the Hilltop.

“You go to GW, right?”

5. Return

You tear up as you see Healy from across the Key Bridge. It’s been too long since last you met. You bask in the glow of a new semester, telling yourself that this is the year you finally get it together. No more going out on Tuesday nights or skipping every class that meets before 2 pm. No more eating Wisey’s cookies for dinner or convincing yourself that walking up Lau steps counts as a workout. Yes, you’ll abandon this attitude completely within the next two weeks, but it’s nice to enjoy the “new and improved 2018 you!” while it lasts. You’re reunited with your squad, you’re wearing the one cool piece of clothing you got for Christmas, and you’re ready for Syllabus Week. Hoya Saxa, it’s good to be home.

You, at Chi Di, two hours after you claimed you were going to start counting your drinks this year, ca 2018, colorized.

Photos/GIFS: Giphy.com, almanac.com

Winter Survival Guide

wintersurvivalguide

If you somehow didn’t notice the white stuff that have been falling from the sky recently or the freezing cold temperatures, let this article assure you it is in fact winter at Georgetown.

georgetown

So before you start filling out your transfer application to Berkley or University of Miami here are some tips to help you survive the cold.

1. Before going outside, dress in every single item of clothing in your closet. You may at first feel stupid, but you will be warm.

2. Cold toilet seat? No problem, just sacrifice a few socks to create this masterpiece.

toilet-seat-heater-socks

3. Invest in a sleeping bag suit. It may seem like an impulsive buy, but also quite possibly the warmest thing you will ever own.

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4. Trick yourself into thinking that you are in a tropical location instead of this polar vortex by decorating your room with things that remind you of summer.

5. Avoid ice at all costs. It may seem like a good idea at the time to try and slide across the ice like a cool kid, but you will most likely end up falling.

If you even find yourself feeling down about the weather here in DC, just remember that there are places that have it much, much worse.

boston
No one wants to live in that.

Photos/Gifs: pinterest.com; myemail.constantcontact.com; gifsoup.com; uproxx.com; memcollection.net; reddit.com; giphy.com; faxo.com

 

Hump Day Chomp: Pho DC

humpdaychomp

If you’re one of the lucky few that are planning a Valentine’s Day Date, look no further than Pho DC in Chinatown.

We stumbled upon this Vietnamese gem last weekend while looking for Rita’s Italian Ice (which, by the way, is CLOSED for the winter – what the what?!?).

After having our ice dreams dashed, we walked up the block looking for something to eat/somewhere to cry when my date stopped short and asked if I had ever had Pho – which is pronounced “f-uh,” not “faux.”

I hadn’t, so we climbed the four steps up to the well-lit and sophisticated restaurant and the rest is history.

g1-01

I ordered Spicy Satay Pho Tai, which is basically a lot of broth mixed with chili paste, thinly sliced beef, cooked onions and thin rice noodles. You get to use chopsticks to scoop the noodles and stuff into this awesome mini-ladle. It was tough, but it got easier as the night progressed. My date had Spicy Pho Shrimp, which actually had a good amount of shrimp. The only annoying thing was that the tails had not yet been removed. Both dishes came with little bowls of basil, bean sprouts and lime that could be added to the soup.

The real winners were the sauces: one spicy orange sauce that tasted like sriracha on steroids, and one sweet brown sauce that was like a thicker, sweeter soy sauce. These were magical when added (in small dollops) to the spoonfuls of noodles.

We also tried Vietnamese Coffee, which is really rich coffee that has condensed milk at the bottom. You can stir the milk until the coffee reaches its optimum level of sweetness and pour it over ice if you wish (we wished, and it was delicious).

This place had it all – great music, wonderful food, fun atmosphere. It was also really easy to get to – just a couple of blocks from the Gallery Place/Chinatown metro stop. Pho DC is pho-sho one of the best places you can have Valentine’s Day dinner (or anti-Valentine’s day dinner) this weekend!

Photo: http://www.phodc.com/index.php

Holiday Spirit in Dahlgren Quad

dahlgren

With the Pumpkin Spice Latte being gradually replaced by the Peppermint Mocha as the drink of choice for all basic Georgetown students, one can tell the holidays are slowly taking over campus.

The advent of the holiday season means a lot will be happening at Georgetown in the coming weeks. There will be the RHO rush of care packages, the themed happy hours, as well as the many wonderfully planned activities sponsored by various Georgetown administrative offices and student groups!

One of 4E’s favorite festivities is happening this Friday, Dec. 5 at 5 p.m. in Dahlgren Quad: the Lighting of the Georgetown University Christmas Tree!

The Georgetown University Department of Performing Arts, the Mask and Bauble Dramatic Society, and the Office of the President invite all members of the Georgetown community to convene this Friday night for some good times and holiday cheer.

Here is a breakdown of what you can expect on this jolly night:

1. The actual lighting of the tree. Dahlgren Quad is the most picturesque spot on campus in the winter and the only thing to make it better is a ginormous, glowing tree right in the middle of it.

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Gorgeous, isn’t it?

2. Hot cocoa and snacks. Georgetown doesn’t skimp when it comes to holiday cheer. There will be snacks and hot cocoa served to all of the people waiting outside throughout the event’s activities. Life doesn’t get more delicious than hot cocoa.

3. Mask and Bauble’s performance of “A Christmas Carol.” Come and see the incredibly talented dramatic society put on this Christmas classic. I’m sure it will live up to the fond memories of your awkward 8th grade self hopelessly stumbling through Tiny Tim lines in English class. Or was that just me?

4. Holiday music. Various Georgetown musical groups will be showcasing their talents through classic holiday hits. You can bet the 4E bloggers will be performing our group interpretive dance to Mariah Carey’s “All I Want for Christmas is You.”

5. Temperate DC winter weather. Although weather.com says it will be a nice cool 45 degrees this Friday night, based on recent trends, that could easily change to 75 degrees. Nothing screams “holiday” like a 0% chance of snow and the ability to rock a t-shirt to the event.

So get ready for tons of Georgetown themed holiday cheer!

Photos: alumni.georgetown.edu; tumblr.com; college.georgetown.edu/collegenews/celebrating-faith-at-georgetown.html

Hump Day Chomp: Toki Underground

humpdaychompHopefully the first of many, Hump Day Chomp is a new weekly posting that intends, perhaps unsuccessfully, to make your Hump day a bit less humpy. We’ve found restaurants that are (mostly) cheap, rarely visited by our Georgetown amigos and, above all, pretty freaking good to get you through the week. So without further ado, I would like to presenteth our first Hump Day Chomp, Toki Underground.

Toki Underground is a small, cozy restaurant located at 1234 H St. NE, nuzzled between another Asian restaurant and one of those dark bars with scary tattooed bartenders. As you go up the narrow stairs, you can hear 90s music playing and Toki’s red lighting infiltrate the walkway. For a split second, I wondered if I was being taken into some sort of Red Light District, praying that I wouldn’t get deported if I somehow got caught. Thankfully, my friend and I were greeted by a smiling hostess.

TOKI

Toki does not have any tables — only limited bar seating. The dangling lamps and awesome wall art make you feel as though you are in a hip, hole-in-the-wall in central Kyoto. All germaphobes can rejoice because there is an open kitchen to the left, in case you are worried about the noodle-making process. The waiter behind the bar also happens to be the bartender, which is cool but might lead to poor choices considering you have class on Thursday.

Their menu is pretty short and their specialty is Taiwanese ramen, but they also have different types of dumplings. We ordered the pork dumplings to share and I had the vegetarian ramen that had roasted root vegetables soup, tofu, daikon and shitake mushrooms. My friend had the Toki Classic, with pulled pork and pickled ginger. I immediately regretted my decision.

toki2

Ramen bowls cost $11 or $12, and they are HUGE. You will feel fuller than Chris Christie after an all-you-can-eat buffet at Friday’s, so believe me when I say it’s worth it. They also offer an assortment of Japanese beers and sakes that the waiter/bartender will gladly pair with whatever you decide to order.

All in all, Toki Underground was fan-freaking-tastic. Although you might have to wait a while for the limited bar seating, H Street is a good place to explore while you kill time. They also offer take-out, so give ‘em a call if you’re in a hurry. Once we sat down, however, the food came very quickly. Get out of the Gtown Bubble and have some fun. Remember, winter is coming.

Toki Underground
1234 H St NE
(202) 388-3086
Nearest metro stop: Union Station on the red line. You might want to share an Uber once you get there, as H St. is more than a mile from the stop.

Friday Fixat10ns: D.C.’s Weather Bender

[8tracks width=”300″ height=”250″ playops=”” url=”http://8tracks.com/mixes/3484597″]

The weather these past few weeks has been ridiculous. Cold, warm, snow, ice and back to warm again … that stupid groundhog from Pennsylvania (not even gonna take a crack at how to spell his name) had no idea what he was doing this year. The only good to come from this crazy weather has been the one day of classes off and the joy of seeing snowmen spring to life all over campus – albeit only to be melted a few days later. Enjoy the warm weather while it lasts, because come the start of next week, it’ll be back to coats, boots and scarves.

As we enter the final week of February, here’s some music you can jam out to while staying inside, because you can be certain it’s the only place that has any semblance of climate control.

1. I Hate Everything About You – Three Days Grace While the recent change of weather is much appreciated, it’s not going to last. The cold weather’s insistence on remaining in D.C. is really starting to get to me.

2. Pour Some Sugar on Me – Def Leppard Who knows, maybe this is what’ll be coming next.

3. Hot N’ Cold – Katy Perry The sudden changes in weather are just too much for me. My closet is a mess.

4. Snow (Hey Oh) – Red Hot Chili Peppers While we all enjoyed the relatively significant amount of snow we got, let’s hope that was the end of it and that we’re slowly transitioning to spring.

5. Skyfall – Adele The perfect way to describe how the clouds have been treating us these past few weeks.

6. Lights and Thunder – Krewella Thankfully, the recent bout of rain that just swept through D.C. didn’t include this, but there are no promises for the near future.

7. Ass Back Home – Gym Class Heroes Only two more weeks until you get to return home to (hopefully) the weather you love!

8. Paradise – Tiësto Give it a little more time, and soon we’ll be in that perfect high 60’s/low 70’s range that’s impossible not to love.

9. Sleep All Day – Jason Mraz I mean, it’s the only viable option right now, isn’t it?

10. Sunshine – David Guetta It’s coming. Just be patient.

Photo: android3dvideos.com