Cries for Help: Carvings in Lau Cubicles

As a nearly 230-year-old institution, Georgetown is host to secrets that current students can hardly fathom.

Hopefully no basilisks tho 🐍 #snakesofgeorgetown

Some of these secrets date back to the school’s founding. Messages etched by early students into the stone walls of Healy, White-Gravenor and Dahlgren — “Thou art fairer than a principled Jesuit,” “Thy perfume sweetens the scent of the stankiest Leo’s dish return,” etc. — have faded over time.

Actual footage of the Healy clock ringing every 15 minutes.

However, contemporary graffiti is alive and well in some of the newer and more utilized buildings on campus. Most anonymous messages, in fact, are located in none other than Lauinger Library, a hotspot of ~brutal~ nervous breakdowns on campus.

Lauinger? I barely know her.

Please join me as I reveal the most honest and repulsive thoughts of Georgetown students: those scrawled on the inside of Lau cubicles and Walsh restrooms in desperate acts of self-expression.

Me as I plumb Lau’s dusty depths. Also, if you don’t know what movie this gif is from, I can’t be friends with you.

Georgetown Confessions

It’s amazing that the president found time to helicopter over to Georgetown and vandalize our library! Spelling errors aside, this is 100% a rule to live by. #FightAgainstTheCapitalistCorp

This was found covering approximately 4 feet of vertical space on the lower level of Lau. I mean … say it loud, say it proud??? 😳🤷🏻‍♀️

Breaking down gender barriers one act of vandalism at a time.

You’ve got to admit, coming out and claiming the Walsh fourth floor women’s bathroom as one of your favorite spots on campus is a bold move. Kudos to this brave soul.

Slackademia

This one is honestly too relevant right now. I love how this ~poet~ backed up some linguistics major’s revelation with a quintessentially Georgetown story of academic humiliation.

4E was tipped off that this one was drawn by a struggling freshman who started their “Problem of God” paper the night before it was due and realized that they were supposed to “conduct a survey.” Yikes.

Quarter-Life Crises

If Lana Del Rey went to Georgetown, these would be the lyrics to her No. 1 song. FYI, if unlike this songwriter, the middle stall in the Walsh third floor bathroom isn’t really your vibe, check out these other spots on campus where you can bawl your eyes out.

This picture illustrates what happens when SFSers get too into their Neo-Sovietism class and then realize that they have to make themselves marketable to consulting firms for summer internships.

Classic Georgetown Elitism

Okay, Brock, that’s only because your dad donated a swimming pool there! Get off your high horse, please.

I mean… George Washington probably would have been a Hoya. #justsayin

Hoyas Reveal Their Ugly Side

This statement is unacceptable. Georgetown students are practically defined by their constant belittlement of campus dining and love for mainstream hip-hop. Do better, Hoyas.

Now that you’ve seen some of the innermost thoughts of Georgetown students, I encourage you to look around the next time you’re struggling to write a paper in Lau at 2 a.m. You may find inspiring messages, crude drawings or desperate cries for help.

Either way, the notes left behind by past Hoyas are an important part of Georgetown’s history that current students can and should bond over.

Did you know that Ben Gates holds a degree in American history from Georgetown? #NotableAlum

Best of luck with finals, everyone! Keep scribblin’ away.

Note: I’d like to apologize to all of the people I weirded out while sneaking around Lau and Walsh taking pictures.

Sources: Giphy, Facebook (Georgetown Memes for Non-Conforming Jesuit Teens)

What Your Favorite Study Spot Says About You

Study Spot

We all have that place. It’s where, when the going gets tough, we hunker down and bust out that paper due in T-minus five hours, or cram as much information into our already occupied coffee-addicted minds. You could say that where you study is almost as important as what you’re studying. Which is why we at 4E have taken the time to prepare a little cheat sheet — not about econ or orgo but about what your favorite study place really says about you.

Lau 2

You thrive in chaos. You’re a social butterfly; however, you also suffer from extreme FOMO. You spend your weeknights sitting around a table with all of your best buds and the perfect view of the Midnight Mug line. You are either a connoisseur in the art of procrastinating or you really can get work done in the middle of pure pandemonium. If you are the latter, I commend you — you’ll survive in this world.

 

Hariri (MSB)

You are most likely in the business school or you just want to snag that booth. You are practical because you know that there will always be an outlet and it will usually be fairly quiet, until that 9 p.m. graduate business class gets out. You have an appreciation for the finer things as you soak up the light and airy ambiance of the MSB. Not to mention the bathrooms are pretty sweet.

Copley Lawn

You love the outdoors and want to embrace all and any good weather that comes along. You may suffer from seasonal depression, but when that first beautiful spring day hits campus, you’re the first one to snag the sunniest spot. You thrive while sprawled out on your plush blanket that you brought to college specifically for these lawn days. You are usually laid-back and carefree until the end of November and you see your precious lawn dusted with a layer of snow. Sorry if these next few months are a little rough for you.

 

Saxbys

You like some human interaction, but you are not willing to endure the chaos that ensues on Lau 2. You are rather sophisticated, people-watching, sipping your coffee and listening to your fantastic Spotify playlist. You like to feel cozy and independent as you rigorously study on the tiny table that can barely fit your laptop, coffee and notebook.

Regents

If you study in Regents you are either one or both of these things: Someone who has an established relationship with the Einstein’s swiper lady (because you take a bagel break more often than you should and need to be in close proximity to food), and/or a pre-med or science major and you only see the outside world from this building’s beautiful formula-filled windows. If you are one of the latter, you may feel at times that your social life is lacking, but have no fear. All of that studying will pay off … well, hopefully.

This campus is filled with an endless array of study spots that do not include the confines of your room. In the last few weeks of this semester, go explore these spots and at least try to study.

Gifs: giphy.com; Photo: payette.com