Tips for Staying Warm This Winter

It’s officially winter, my fellow Hoyas*.  You know what that means: finals, Christmas and, of course, being freezing at all times.  Here are some tips and tricks from your friends at 4E to help you stay warm over the next few months:

*Yes, I know winter doesn’t officially start until December something, but when it starts getting dark outside before I’ve eaten lunch, I consider it winter and so should you. 

1. Invest in a Nice Jacket

I mean nice but not too nice. If you purchase either a Canada Goose or a Barbour, I can guarantee it will mysteriously “go missing” from a chair in the corner of some Henle party within a month — s/o to GUPD Chief of Police Jay Gruber.

2. Stop Drinking Iced Coffee.

It’s disgusting even when it’s actually hot outside. There is absolutely no reason to order iced coffee while wearing a scarf. Ice doesn’t belong in coffee. Just order it hot and stop being so weird.

3. Eat a Hot Chick From Wisey’s

Haha, get it? Because it’s “Hot.” Also, your stomach will hurt so badly afterward that you’ll forget all about how cold you feel!

4. Run (From the Rats on Campus)

There are So. Many. Rats. On. This. Campus. You’ll be plenty warm in no time once you start sprinting away from the ones that have started nesting directly outside your apartment!

5. Get a Significant Other

Cuffing Szn, amirite #ladies?  70 percent of Hoyas date other Hoyas!*

*and end things the minute it finally gets warm enough to darty again.

6. Ghost Everyone in Your Life Who Lives in Burleith.

In these frigid temperatures, it’s just not worth the walk. Sacrifices must be made.

7. Take a Bird Scooter Everywhere

The less time you have to spend outside, the better. To get where you’re going faster, Bird everywhere. Bird to class. Bird to Leo’s. Bird to Lau. Bird in Lau. The relatively high risk of accidentally “running into someone” or “getting run over by a car” is definitely worth cutting three minutes out of your commute.

P.S. If you Lime, Skip or — God forbid — Lyft anywhere on this campus, I hope you get stuck behind a slow walker on a narrow path.

8. Stop Going to Class.

You can’t get cold if you don’t go outside. Literally stop leaving your dorm/apartment/house for any reason. The semester is basically over anyway; you’ll be fine.

9. Start Smoking Cigarettes.

In light of the recent, shocking revelation that Juuls are bad for your health, try the fun alternative that looks cool, tastes great and, most importantly, keeps your fingers warm!*

*This is sarcasm. There are already way too many people contributing to the cloud of carcinogens I have to walk through before entering Lau each day. Please do not become one of them.

10. Stress-Cry.

Nothing warms your face faster than a steady stream of stress-induced tears. Finals season is right around the corner to help you out with this one.

Stay warm, Hoyas!

 

Sources: giphy.com, pinterest.com

Frequently Asked Questions: Thanksgiving Edition

Hoyas, Thanksgiving is right around the corner. Turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, apple pie: A literal cornucopia of sweet and savory delights awaits you at your family dining table.

(Unless you’re staying here, in which case, Happy Friendsgiving!)

In spite of that thicc feast being prepared at home, one thing poses a threat to the sanctity of Thanksgiving: your family.

Yes, those people whom you may love the most, who have the ability to ruin your short holiday with the annual awkward interrogations about your life away from home.

And so, 4E has prepared this guide to help you navigate those cringeworthy FAQs around the dinner table.

What do you think of Donald Trump?

Oh, damn. Uncle Bob starting off strong.

Politics is bound to come up during the fall feast, and depending on your views, this question could be a real curveball.

No fear, though, because our professionally designed answer is to laugh awkwardly while walking away and saying, “Man, I don’t know.” Make sure to trail off on “know” to feign some “youthful ignorance” to avoid confrontation. Move quickly before your family starts debating immigration over the mashed potatoes.

Do you still go to church?

This one’s for all my people raised with organized religion (looking at you, Catholics) and is the logically awkward follow-up to a political question.

As your aunt plays with her golden cross necklace, you may feel anxiety in answering her inquiry, because, honestly, you don’t. For all those Christian expats out there, you couldn’t even recite the “Our Father” anymore if she asked. TBH, you always just kinda mumbled through that part.

So, to avoid that disappointing revelation to her, just lie and say “yes“.

And, like before, walk promptly away.

What’s your major?  What are your plans after college?

If these two come in sequence, you better be ready, because this one’s the mother of all one-two punches.

We’re actually going to start with the second question, because it’s the easier of the two. Let’s be honest; there are only two acceptable answers: doctor or lawyer. So, no matter what your major is, if you want to avoid a long line of questioning that ultimately leaves you pissed at your stupid cousin you only ever see once a year, just say doctor or lawyer.

By that logic, admit your major honestly and depending on whether it’s a humanity or a science, choose doctor or lawyer accordingly.

And if you do actually want to be a doctor or lawyer, lucky you.

Do you have a [girlfriend/boyfriend/partner]?

Nope. That’s always the answer, because whenever someone asks, you don’t.

Can you help with the dishes?

Alas, the classic parental guilt trap.

Either your father knows you can’t refuse to do a simple favor, or he’s giving too much credit to your turkey-stuffed corpse.

The dilemma lies in that you could never say no and break his heart, but you sure as hell don’t want to say yes.

Therefore, proceed with the most elementary of “avoiding awkward interactions” maneuvers: Walk away like you didn’t hear anything.

And, finally…

When’s the next time we’ll see you?

You’re at the train station, bus stop, airport or whatever means of transportation is taking you back to Georgetown. You’ve had your fill of food and family. You’re ready to go back and be thrown straight into finals prep.

You’re satisfied and holding it together.

Then, your mother throws this one last rock at you.

You smile and reassure her that Christmas is right around the corner, but despite all the ~uncomfiness~ that sometimes comes with seeing your family, you both want it to be sooner.

So, this is the only question we don’t have an answer for, and all we can do is wish you luck in keeping back tears while you start to miss your mom and her cooking.

Let the feast begin!

Go, Hoyas, run! RUN! Go home (if you can) and celebrate Holy Turkey Day! Papers and midterms and projects and WORK have consumed your life for the past two months.

We’ve all earned an extended break.

So, enjoy some real food with the realest people, whether it be your friends or your family.

And, most of all, get some sleep, because we’re all about to lose plenty of it as soon as we come back! :)

4E’s Thanksgiving Countdown

It doesn’t seem valid to get excited year after year about a holiday that commemorates our subjugation of native peoples and destructive colonial ways, but let me tell you: I am excited for Thanksgiving break.

You may ask me, “What could be so exciting about five days in central New Jersey?” Well, first of all, New Jersey is the most underrated state. Second of all, a brief reprieve from midterms is exactly what I need to restore my sanity.

Please join me on a ~journey~ to cozy, fall-time feels. Whether you’re travelling home for Thanksgiving or not, these activities should allow you to start healing that part of your soul that a semester-long midterm season has sucked out of you.

First, play this song for maximum reading experience.

Day 1: Nov. 5

Divine your Thanksgiving horoscope. What’s in the stars for you this year? If you’re going home, will you finally hook up with your high school crush? Will you get taken to the hospital with an irreversible food coma? Only one way to find out…

Day 2: Nov. 6

Go vote. If you haven’t voted yet, please motivate yourself with the thought of Great-Grandma Pat’s wrath when you tell her you abused the right she fought so hard for back when they only showered like once a week or whatever. This way, when your family members start arguing at the dinner table, you’ll be able to validate the opinions you’ve honed in all of those SFS classes by proving that you’re an active participant in our democracy.

Day 3: Nov. 7

Plan out your plate. Everyone knows that going into the holiday meal without an attack plan is a fool’s errand. Use the below image to prevent future discomfort and maximize future deliciousness.

Image result for thanksgiving plate outline

Day 4: Nov. 8

Get the 411 on those crazy relatives you’re afraid to see. Call your mom. You should probably do this anyway, but for your own safety, ask her to give you an update about Aunt Linda’s “situation” so you’re not blindsided on the big day.

Day 5: Nov. 9

Start filling up your shopping carts. Two weeks before Black Friday, go against your better judgment and let those natural consumer instincts run wild. I’ve never actually shopped on Black Friday before, but I like to imagine that filling up online shopping carts is just as good.

Day 6: Nov. 10

Check out those fall colors. Get out of your musty apartment for once and take a walk somewhere in the city — it’s actually very beautiful here and we tend to take that for granted too often.

Day 7: Nov. 11

It’s cuffing season. Have you found your big/little spoon yet? It’s getting pretty chilly outside; you should probably get on that.

Day 8: Nov. 12

Convince your dad that a turducken is a bad idea. Tell him the hard truth: 55 is too old to spice things up, especially with the multi-meat equivalent of the Human Centipede. Like him, sometimes oldies are goodies — no more of this millennial nonsense.

Day 9: Nov. 13

Start packing. I’m serious. If you do it this far in advance, you’ll avoid that last-minute packing nightmare in which you somehow only bring home booty shorts, a turtleneck and over-the-knee boots.

Day 10: Nov. 14

Do something ~cute~ with your friends. Make a pie. Drink some chai. Discuss the best moisturizing strategies for preventing dry winter skin (non-spon but pls check out this account @dewydudes). Put aside homework for a sec and appreciate the value of good, wholesome fun.

Day 11: Nov. 15

Come up with a fake major to get your grandparents off your back. They don’t understand that you’re not wasting their money; you’re just finding yourself. So, pose as a Future Government Official/Investment Person to get out of hot water with the old folks.

Day 12: Nov. 16

Learn how to play football (?). I’m very thankful that my family does not maintain this tradition, but if yours does, it’s probably time to tighten up that spiral. Who knows, maybe you’ll get concussed and won’t have to take any more exams!

Bradley Cooper in “A Star is Born,” 2018 (colorized).

Day 13: Nov. 17

Thank your roommate(s). Whether you’re best friends or mere living partners, be grateful to this person for putting up with you. This way, your inability to wash dishes and sexiling habits won’t weigh heavy on your conscience over the break.

Day 14: Nov. 18

Friendsgiving! Get together with all of your friends for one last hurrah before going your separate ways. A group dinner feat. Leo’s turkey and mashed potatoes never looked so cute.

Day 15: Nov. 19

Watch the twurkey dance. This is a good distraction that will get you hype for the holiday.

Day 16: Nov. 20

What? Sorry. I’m already gone. If possible, remove yourself mentally and/or physically from the Georgetown environment. This could be done in the form of a really long nap, ripping up a blue book — you name it.

Hoya Saxa! I’m grateful for you <3

Sources: festival-collection.com, giphy.com, youtube.com, people.com

10 Reasons You Should Buy Basketball Season Tickets

Many years ago, the mere thought of writing this article would have been absurd. There was once a time when school spirit was high, lottery picks roamed the Hilltop and students needed no convincing when it came time to buy basketball season tickets. But that was a lifetime ago.*

*I’m actually referring to as recently as 2013. You read that right. Just five years ago, Georgetown basketball finished first in the Big East, was ranked as high as fifth in the AP Poll and star guard Otto Porter was selected third in the NBA draft. Everyone needs to calm down (looking at you, @EveryAlumnusWhoGraduatedInThe1980s). We’re going to be fine.

But I digress. We are gathered here today to discuss the current state of Georgetown basketball as it exists in 2018. And I’m here to tell you why — despite what you may have heard from disgruntled seniors — buying season tickets is well worth the money.

So here we go:

1. Celebrities

I’ll admit it: I spend far more time scrolling through Daily Mail Online than I do reading The New York Times. And based on how many of you waited in line for hours to see Bradley Cooper speak in Gaston Hall, I’m guessing you’re just as obsessed with celebrities as I am.

So, even if you couldn’t care less about basketball and will spend the entire game staring at your Instagram feed instead of glancing at the court, you should still buy tickets. Why? It’s simple: Famous people might show up.

Don’t believe me? See below:

Former President Barack Obama sitting courtside, cheering on the Hoyas with that guy from the memes.
Obama thanking loyal fans who bought season tickets.

 

The dad from “Are We There Yet?” AND the second-best detective from “Law and Order: SVU”

 

Mr. Hailey Baldwin

Think of how it will feel being left out when all your friends start sharing those coveted Obama selfies on Insta.

2. Less Time On Campus

Literally any day I do not have to spend stuck on this moldy, rat-infested, construction-filled campus is a day well-spent. I say this out of love, but also, please do something, @JohnJDeGioia; none of the sinks work, and the buildings are literally infested with living snakes. Search @georgetown.hotmess on Instagram for specifics. The Verizon Center Capital One Arena is nice and does not use tulips to cover its glaring problems.

3. Heyyyyyyy Baby

Even during the worst losses, the pep band plays that song that goes “Heyyyyyyyy-yyyy Baby, I wanna knoooooooow if you’ll be my girl (*dun dun dun dun*)” and everybody sings and sort of dances along to it. It’s really fun and a nice break from the routine of “Mr. Brightside.” Also, if you don’t know what song I’m talking about, just sing the words I wrote and Shazam it.

4. Beer

 In the recent, infamous words of He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named AKA Less Attractive Matt Damon AKA Are You Kidding Me @Joe Manchin: “I liked beer, I still like beer.” Capital One Arena has beer.

Disclaimer: Students must be 21 or older to drink aforementioned beer.

5. Chick-Fil-A

Chick-Fil-A is available at the games, and it’s honestly faster to Uber over to the arena, order and eat your meal than it is to wait in line at the Leavey Center location.

6. Slam Dunk

Have you ever seen somebody dunk a basketball in person? It is so cool. How do they jump so high? And make the ball go in the basket while jumping? This alone is worth the price of admission. Mac McClung, do us proud this year. Also, if you’re reading this, follow me back on Instagram.

7. The Memes

When the meme page was first born way back in the early days of 2017, the memes almost exclusively referenced a man they called “JT3”. And it was these very memes that single-handedly ended JT3’s reign and brought St. Patrick into our lives.

For you youngsters out there, this was a dark time, but an important one nonetheless. Those who do not remember history are doomed to repeat it. You must go to the games so that you can recognize the warning signs. If things ever get that bad again, it is your responsibility to make the next generation of memes. The fate of the Hilltop depends on it.

8. The Capitals

Fun fact: Capital One Arena is also home to the current Stanley Cup champions, the Washington Capitals! For the unfamiliar, the Capitals are the hockey team that locals pretend to like because all the other D.C. sports teams are bad. Also, their team captain partied at the Georgetown waterfront with the cup this summer and then jumped in the fountain. Based on the Snapchats I saw, it looked pretty fun. So maybe he’ll show up to one of our games! Fun!

9. Alumni

Most of the fans at these games are alumni over the age of 40 who are eager to loudly remind you that school spirit “isn’t what it used to be” (and also that there was once “a pub in the basement of Healy.” Seriously, they will talk about that damn pub for hours if you don’t stop them. Like, there is no way it was that fun.)

Now I know “irate Hoya baby boomers” might not sound like a recipe for a good time, but think of it in terms of networking. It’s simple. These people love Georgetown basketball, and they’ll love you too if you tell them that you also love Georgetown basketball (see: the Transitive Property of Hoya Saxa). Get them reminiscing about the good ol’ days for five minutes in the popcorn line and the next thing you know, boom: You’ve somehow secured that elusive Goldman internship. All you MSBros do not want to miss this opportunity.

10. Me

Listen up: This is my senior year, and I do not want to spend the remainder of my glory days sitting in a mostly empty arena on a Tuesday night. These memories have to get me through the rest of what will probably be a pretty boring life, so they better be good. Just buy tickets, show up to the games, get some beer, cheer and make the most of it.

Go get your tickets at wearegeorgetown.com

Hoya Saxa.

Disclaimer: Patrick Ewing is NOT paying me to write this article, but if you’re reading this, Coach Ewing, can you please grant me access to the Thompson Center in exchange for this free publicity??  I won’t even use any of the equipment, I just want to get a cool pic for my Insta story so I can lord it over the peasants at Yates. Email 4E if this is cool.

Sources: giphy.com, pinterest.com, genius.com, sbnation.com, fansided.com, facebook.com

The Five Stages of Being Sick at Georgetown

If you haven’t spent these past weeks drowning in used tissues and Advil, this Hoya desperately wants to know your secret.  Yes! You heard that barely concealed coughing fit from the back of your crowded microeconomics lecture correctly, the Georgetown Plague™ is upon us.

While we may be living in a petri dish, at least the relatability of this struggle can be exploited by your friends at 4E. Here are the five stages of being sick on the Hilltop:

1. Attempting home remedy

Throat coat?  Check. Advil?  Check. Suddenly wishing you were pre-med?  Check. All of the Aspirin that you packed from home might be able to save you, right?  Right??

Although copious amounts of tea and Tylenol can’t stop your impending doom, it won’t stop you from trying! 

2. Taking a trip to the Student Health Center

After your own medical knowledge fails, surely Georgetown, the fine institution you are paying your life savings to attend, will be able to rescue you from yourself!  A quick 30-minute phone call later, you’ve booked an appointment to see a doctor… next Thursday.

3. Accepting your fate

It’s true!  Sometimes you need to be sick in order to appreciate being well — or, at least, that’s what you tell yourself to feel better! Your roommate has to inevitably put up with 4 a.m. coughing fits, and you have to fight through that 9 a.m. lecture while putting up with dirty looks from students and professors alike.

Apparently, being sick is a natural part of life. Just one that no one wants to experience.

4. Freedom

The long journey comes to an end. Alas now, you have no more excuses for procrastinating your midterm paper!

The sudden rebirth you feel is accompanied by a newfound appreciation for health, along with promises to work out at Yates every day and stop eating Chick-Fil-A every night.

 

5. Repetition

That’s right folks, your already-weakened immune system will inevitably fail you again!  The close quarters of dorm life and crowded Vil A rooftops are breeding grounds for contamination.  

But fear not!  Because if you can survive the Georgetown Plague™, you can easily survive anything the Hilltop throws your way.

From all of us here at 4E, get well soon!

Sources: giphy.com, choicechiropractic.net

Mr. Georgetown 2018 Preview

Homecoming weekend means one thing: Mr. Georgetown is back! You probably weren’t fast enough to score tickets to the ~hottest~ event of the year, but luckily you can still learn a little bit more about the best that Georgetown has to offer. We sat down with the contestants to give you an exclusive sneak peak of Mr. Georgetown 2018.


Ryan Yoch- Mr. Hoya Blue

Hometown: Twin Cities, Minn.

School: College

Major: Government, Minor: Arabic and Business Administration

What do you love the most about Hoya Blue?

The moment when you lose yourself in a sporting event, where everything else in the entire world ceases to exist and all you can watch is that shot, that play, and all you want is for it to go in — it’s the greatest feeling in the world. You get addicted to it.

Who is your favorite Georgetown alum?

I’ve got to rep Hoya Blue: Allen Iverson.

What is your most beautiful feature?

My deep, gravelly Hoya Blue voice that I bring out for sporting events. (Editor’s Note: Ryan demonstrated this voice for me and it was pretty impressive).

Jorge DeNeve- Mr. The Voice

Hometown: Los Angeles, Calif.

School: College

Major: Math and Economics

What do love the most about The Voice?

If you’re really passionate about writing and if you enjoy it, those are the people that are going to stick around. As we continue to bring in more people who are like-minded in terms of their enthusiasm, people really put their heart and soul into the organization. I really enjoy the dedication and camaraderie we all have.

What is your favorite spot on campus?

Shaw Field. I’ve covered women’s soccer for two years and I have a spot in the middle of the bleachers, fourth row, right behind the coach. Watching them make their run to the Final Four in 2016 and in the Big East Tournament last year was a lot of fun. I’ll always associate that spot with good memories.

What is your most beautiful feature?

I play soccer. My right foot.

JD Donohue- Mr. Superfood

Hometown: Spring Lake, N.J.

School: MSB

Major: OPIM, Minor: Government

What do you love the most about Superfood?

It’s an outlet for creativity. Especially when you’re 21 and the world is starting to get serious, you can go joke around and sing for a few hours a week. And the people. When I went abroad, the people I missed the most were all in Superfood.

Who is your favorite Georgetown alum?

For famous alum, Bradley Cooper. But I also want to shout out to my friend Christy, who is coming to Mr. Georgetown. We met in Superfood when I was a freshman and she was a senior and we were immediate soul friends.

What is your favorite spot on campus?

The HFSC (Editor’s Note: JD thinks saying “Heal Fam Stu Cen” is “cumbersome”).

William Morris- Mr. NSO

Hometown: Dallas, Texas

School: College

Major: American Studies and Government, Minor: Theology

What do you love the most about NSO?

I love how we have the opportunity to welcome students and their families to Georgetown. We have the chance to be their first impression of their time on the Hilltop and we can help set them up for success.

What is your favorite spot on campus?

The deck on the seventh floor of Arrupe. Incredible view of campus and D.C.

What is your most beautiful feature?

My dazzling smile.

Jose Villalobos Gonzalez- Mr. Ritmo y Sabor

Hometown: Mexico City, Mexico

School: SFS

Major: STIA,  with a concentration in international development

What do you love the most about Ritmo y Sabor?

It feels like a little bit of home. Being in a foreign country where the culture is so different from Latin America, it’s really nice having a place where you can joke around about familiar things and share a little bit of your culture. Whenever we perform, we try to impress the sense that it’s more than just a flashy dance and is actually a part of a larger culture.

What is your favorite meme in the meme page?

The one about how you describe working at the RHO on your resume.

What is your most beautiful feature?

My eyebrows.

Micheal Whittington- Mr. GU Women of Color

Hometown: Trenton, N.J.

School: College

Major: Biochemistry, Minor: Japanese

What do you love the most about GU Women of Color?

For me, it’s the executive board. A lot of them are my close friends and they are all so intelligent, so articulate and so go-and-get-after-it. It’s really awe-inspiring to watch.

What is your favorite meme on the meme page?

I don’t have a singular favorite, but anything involving John Degioia’s face.

What is your most beautiful feature?

My smile.

Michael Chanen- Mr. GERMS

Hometown: Seattle, Wash.

School: College

Major: Physics

What do you love most about GERMS?

There are a lot of integrative aspects that are similar to the field of study that I want to pursue. Being able to interact with patients and feel like I’m providing a substantive good to my community is a really cool part of GERMS that I don’t think I would get elsewhere.

Who is your favorite Georgetown alum?

Jenny Frankie. She graduated last year. She is a really lovely and sweet individual who makes me happy whenever I talk to her.

What is your favorite spot on campus?

Lau 2. I spend so much time there — I spent more time there sophomore year studying for Organic Chemisty than I did in my own room. There are so many friends I’ve met on Lau 2 and I have a lot of sentimental memories there. It’s awful and hideous, but if I were in some other, nice library, I would spend all my time looking around and wouldn’t get my work done.

Marcos Morales- Mr. GIVES

Hometown: Santa Barbara, Calif.

School: MSB

Major: Marketing and Management

What do you love about GIVES?

The people. They’re some of the nicest and kindest people that I’ve met here at Georgetown and they make you happy to be around them

What is your favorite meme on the meme page?

The one where the honor council plagiarized the email warning us not to plagiarize. 

What is your most beautiful feature? 

My eyebrows. I’ve been told I have very thick eyebrows and I take that as a compliment.

Jeremy Canfield- Mr. Running Club

Hometown: Shrewsbury, Mass.

School: College

Major: Physics and Math

What do you love the most about the running club?

It’s open to everyone. A lot of people hear running club and their immediate thought is that they might not be fast enough, but speaking from personal experience, there really is no “level” needed to be in running club. So you get a very wide and diverse group of people. They really represent the university well and I’ve met all of my best friends through it.

Who is your favorite Georgetown alum?

My former roommate Cameron. He graduated last year and is one of my best friends. He’s already doing great things. He’ll be going to Papua New Guinea for his job soon and I’m really proud of the work he’s doing.

What is your most beautiful feature?

I love my hair. It’s a pretty rare color and I think I’ve found a good style for it.

Jake Moran- Mr. Club Swimming

Hometown: Wayne, Pa.

School: SFS

Major: International Political Economy

What do you love the most about club swimming?

The team spirit, the camaraderie and the friends I’ve made here. I’ve found a home doing something I love and I got to resurrect my swimming career after high school.

Who is your favorite Georgetown alum?

My mother because she inspires me.

What is your favorite meme on the meme page?

The meme about the fire alarms in the Southwest Quad and how all the fathers are going to sue.

Will Glynn- Mr. Ultimate Frisbee

Hometown: Wilton, Conn.

School: College

Major: Government and Economics

What do you love the most about ultimate frisbee?

The community. It’s where I found my place at Georgetown. Even if you’re not super athletically inclined, you can find a place. The people involved are wonderful and really enjoy welcoming newcomers.

Who is your favorite Georgetown alum?

Patrick Seaman, the former president of our club.

What is your most beautiful feature?

My personality.

Luis Montoya- Mr. College Academic Council

Hometown: Whitney, Texas

School: College

Major: Biology, Minor: Chemistry

What do you love the most about the College Academic Council?

I love that we serve as a liaison between the students and the deans. We provide a way for the student body to share their thoughts and ideas with deans. As a science major (on a campus that can seem full of government majors), it’s really important to me to have that representation and make sure that all voices are heard.

Who is your favorite Georgetown alum?

Bradley Cooper.

What is your most beautiful feature?

My teeth or my personality.

Brendan Stelmach- Mr. International Relations Club

Hometown: Chicago, Ill.

School: SFS

Major: International Politics

What do you love the most about the International Relations Club?

What I love the most is the ability to travel. Through the club I’ve gone to New York, Boston, Montreal and Panama City. I love the ability to act on the international part and gain new experiences.

Who is your favorite Georgetown alum?

Jack Ludtke. He graduated two years ago. I’m actually succeeding him as Mr. IRC. His talent was doing a PowerPoint presentation and while he didn’t win, he was probably the nicest guy I’ve met at Georgetown.

What is your favorite meme on the meme page?

I actually submitted one once. It’s the pregame in New South starter pack.

Sagar Anne- Mr. The Hoya

Hometown: Hong Kong

School: MSB

Major: Finance, Minor: Math

What do you love the most about The Hoya?

The people. We have a great culture.

Who is your favorite Georgetown alum?

Patrick Ewing.

What is your most beautiful feature?

Definitely my hair.

 

Not Pictured But Participating: Alex Coopersmith (Mr. Jewish Student Alliance), Harry Clow (Mr. GUGS) and JJ Larkins (Mr. Jawani).

 

We’ll see you all in Gaston Hall on Friday Night! May the best Hoya win!

 

Essential End-Of-Night Songs

Well, it looks like summer is coming to an end, which means the incoming wave of mixed emotions that comes with ~going back to school~.

I know how you must be feeling at this time. If you’re like me, you’re probably grappling with the fact that school inevitably means deadlines and applications and stress and what have you. There are just certain activities that don’t quite lie in my “personal strength” category, including (but not limited to) packing, scheduling, planning and making simple decisions in general.

But hey! Look on the bright side for once: Coming back to school also means returning to an exhilarating, debauchery-filled lifestyle that you now have the privilege of sharing with all your best friends!

And what better way to spend your last few days of summer than dreaming of all the ~great~ parties you’re gonna throw in that brand new Henle.

But beware, young ones! Party hosting is no joke! A few distinguishing factors can turn a potential rager of the century into a total lame-fest faster than you can say DJ Khaled.

Luckily, you have a full bench of experienced professionals here at 4E to advise and protect you — specifically in any aux cord-related endeavors that involve essential Georgetown party classics.

1. Mr. Brightside – The Killers

No other song in the history of humankind has ever got drunk white people more hyped than Mr. Brightside. Ever.

I have sincerely never been to a party where this song didn’t play. And I can’t say I’m mad about it.

2. Georgetown Fight Song

I don’t know a single word to the Georgetown fight song and it still bangs.

3. Party in the USA – Miley Cyrus

This song is so obviously a classic that I don’t even feel the need to explain why you should play it.

4. Walmart Yodel EDM Remix – Yodeling Boy // Famous – Mason Ramsey

If at any point during the night you start to feel yourself hitting the wall, I PROMISE this song will revive you. Don’t fight it. Feel the beat. Feel the passion.

And for anyone who might mind disrespecting the musical artistry of the beloved Mason Ramsey, you can always opt to play his other best song — “Famous.”

This song is just the perfect balance between country and, like, hip. The lyrics are just so real, it breaks my heart. In a, you know, fun-loving, rager, party type of way, sort of. Sometimes, though, you just need some emotional head banging to make your night worth it.

5. Tik Tok – Ke$ha

I don’t think I have to remind anyone that stanning Ke$ha gives you not only a reason to pretend like it’s still 2009, but also to party harder than you ever would have without her. We play this song out of pure reverence for a true queen. After all, Ke$ha is the reason you could ever wake up with dirt and glitter all over yourself and call it a “look.”

But if you really want to mix it up, you can always play the Avril Lavigne acoustic cover of the song just to see how everyone in the room reacts.

(link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OahmkdWS3kQ)

6. Kiss Me Thru the Phone – Soulja Boy

It is a well-known fact that almost nothing gets a party going more than the words “soulja boy tell ‘em.”

Though some people might prefer the classic “Crank That (Soulja Boy),” I have always been a believer that “Kiss Me Thru the Phone” is a just as good, if not better song. I mean, anyone can crank that, but there’s just something about someone pulling out a flawless “678 triple 9 8212” that is just so damn impressive.

7. Thrift Shop – Macklemore & Ryan Lewis

This song has not just one but three (at least) iconic lines, including but not limited to:

“Macklemore can we go thrift shopping?”

“What what what what da da da da dadaba da”

And of course,

“Walk up in the club like whaddup I gotta big c–k”

How could you pass up such poetry?

8. Whatcha Say – Jason Derulo

A healthy JaSoN dErUuLo throwback for when you get tired of listening to “Swallalala” for the millionth time.

Wait, seriously, what did she say tho?

9. Africa – Toto

A classic so great it has consistently reappeared in the top charts since the 80s. This song is the absolute best to sing at the top of your lungs with all your dearest friends.

10. Follow Me – Jamie Lynn Spears (Zoey 101 theme song)

In general, I’m usually against the notion of pretending theme songs to tween shows are real songs, but Zoey 101 is quite the exception. This is one of those songs where when it first starts playing, you might be like “aw man, come on, seriously, like, who would play this song right now dude,” but then it actually starts and you just can’t not sing along.

“Ooooh. I know ya see me standin’ here”

Plus, Chase. Am I right, ladies and gents?

11. Bring Me to life – Evanescence

So you can rock that early 2000s misunderstood, emo, goth girlfriend vibe for 3 minutes and 56 seconds before you get over it and go back to being a basic b—h.

12. All Star- Smash Mouth

someBODY once told me the WORLD is gonna roll me,

I feel like this song would never not be welcome at a Georgetown party. Also, if this song doesn’t remind you of Shrek, wyd?

13. You Belong With Me – Taylor Swift

This one’s for all of us who refuse to accept the death of Old Taylor.

Old Taylor stays reminding us of that pure and innocent optimism we all used to have about being nerdy and cute.

Not to mention that, strategically speaking, playing a Taylor Swift song is the surest way of clearing out the party so you can finally go to bed.

So good luck out there, my fellow Hoyas. And remember, please aux responsibly.

 

Sources: giphy.com, youtube.com, wallpaper-house.com

Places to Eat at 2 AM Now That Wingo’s Is Gone

My time at Georgetown has not been without its fair share of tragedy.

Hillary lost the election. Quick Pita closed. Chi Di (allegedly) shut down. Leo’s has (somehow) remained open. My GoCard picture turned out terribly. Hot Chick/Chicken Madness lost the other election. JT3 was allowed to coach a Division I basketball team. I once accidently made eye contact with a professor on a weekend. And Jack the Bulldog has straight up ignored me every single time I’ve asked to take a picture with him. To say the least, it’s been a rough three years on the Hilltop.

But none of these calamities could have prepared me for the news that broke on June 26th, 2018. As I’m sure you know by now, our beloved Wingo’s has burned down, and its soon-to-open new location is much further away. My first inclination was to write a eulogy that encapsulated what this little restaurant meant to a certain young Hoya who possessed a special love of both chicken wings and the ability to eat chicken wings at 2:00 a.m.; however, I had to abandon that plan when my tears started making it too difficult to see the laptop screen.

But because I am a professional journalist, I will work through the profound pain of this loss in order to write the type of hard-hitting article I know our readers have come to depend on from 4E. So, without further ado, here is a definitive guide of Places to Eat at 2:00 A.M. Now That Wingos is Gone.

Epi  

(Open 24/7)

If you love the feeling of hating yourself in the morning, Epi is the place for you. Their famous quesadilla is a classic choice, and the fries and onion rings are solid options as well, but I am also a big fan of “accidentally” stealing somebody else’s order and just eating whatever it is they decided to get.

Hoya Snaxa

(Technically only open until 1:00 am but whatever you get the point)

If you don’t die from walking downhill to get there, Snaxa is a pretty solid late night choice. Nothing says “Thank God my parents don’t know what their tuition money is really going towards” quite like using your GoCard to buy Cool Ranch Doritos and Cucumber Juul Pods in the early hours of the morning.

Mono Diner

(Open 24/7)

Do you remember that time freshman year when you DFMO’d at a Henle party and then the next week you started feeling gross and tired all the time and then you started panicking because you couldn’t get an appointment at student health for over a month? Have you ever wanted to relive that exact experience but while eating food at 2:00 am? Well look no further than Mono Diner. Located across from the CVS on Wisconsin, Georgetown’s newest 24-hour diner looks pretty good from the outside, but I just do not understand the name choice. Eat with caution.

Muncheez

(Open until 4:30 am)

Muncheez is a conundrum. Much like GUSA or attending a Georgetown basketball game, it has the potential to be great, but always ends up being disappointing in reality. It’s fine. Not good. Not awful. Just fine.

Quick Pita

(Closed forever)

Domino’s 

(Open until 3:00 a.m.)

Delicious (of course), but now that Chi Di is gone, you’ll probably never have a reason to walk on Prospect Street at 2:00 a.m. ever again. Delivery is fine I guess, but it doesn’t run as late and cheesy bread is really meant to be eaten at those blue plastic tables in the store. Why does The Neighborhood of Georgetown find a way to ruin everything we love?

&pizza

(Open until 4:00 a.m.)

Do you like spending more money for pizza that is less delicious and less filling than Dominos? Take the stroll down to Wisconsin Avenue for an overpriced rectangular pie at &pizza.

Bulldog Tavern

(Open until 2:00 a.m.)

Do you like waiting an hour and a half for cold mozzarella sticks? Then Bulldog Tavern is the place for you!

Wisey’s

(Sadly only open until 11:30 p.m.)

It is absolutely baffling to me that Wisey’s closes at 11:30. p.m. It has a prime location near campus and its sandwiches are tailor-made for those whose standards have been lowered after consuming a few adult beverages. If anybody reading this has enough influence to change Wisey’s (’s ?) hours (@JOHNDEGIOIA, @BILLCLINTON, @THEWISEYSRAT) please contact 4E ASAP. I really need for this change to happen in time for my senior year.

So there you have it. A few late-night options to fuel your late-night shenanigans.

This Article is in Loving Memory of Wingo’s (2002-2018). Gone too soon. RIP to the GOAT.

Sources: giphy.com, youtube.com, pinterest.com, wingos.com

Queer Eye: Beyond Reality TV

Listen up people — there’s a new show in town. Out of all of the quasi-reality television that we have proudly consumed in our lifetimes, “Queer Eye has been the most earth-shattering, jaw-dropping, mind-blowing, uplifting, barrier-crossing, awe-inspiring thing that we here at 4E have ever seen.

If you’re looking for some politically-conscious-yet-mindless-content, this is the show for you.

Ever wondered what would happen if five gay men traveled around Georgia (that’s the state, @SFSers) fixing ~sadbois~?

The answer is glorious. This show has everything: makeovers, drama, love, friendship, tears, wine and even redneck margaritas.

In all seriousness, “Queer Eye” aims to cross the political, racial, and social boundaries that have been dividing our country as of late.

Before you start watching, let us tell you how, why, and to what extent the “Fab 5” will change your life.

1. Karamo: “Culture Expert”/Life Coach

In addition to being impeccably groomed, Karamo gives you all the tools you need to reach inside yourself, find that inner worth and show it to the world #LetThatLittleLightShine.

Karamo was a social worker for 10 years, serving LGBTQ youth throughout the South. Now he is helping out an equally needy and oft-overlooked population: sad, aging men.

This man is the soul of the show. Karamo is always there at the pivotal moments, ensuring that the men have been made over, both inside and out.

Favorite Moment: Episode 3, “Dega Don’t”

Karamo and Cory’s drive back from Atlanta. You’ll understand once you see it.

2. Bobby: “Design Expert”/Home Improvement Wizard

An underappreciated talent, Bobby takes the sadbois’ dingy mancaves and transforms them into livable, ~lit~ homes. He’s constantly on the go, perfecting spaces in a blur of hot pink shorts and dazzling platinum hair.

Watch as he reduces grown men to tears with the mere words “marble countertop.”

Favorite Moment: Episode 5, “Camp Rules”

Bobby’s gardening sesh with Bobby Camp: the seeds of a beautiful friendship are sown.

3. Jonathan: “Grooming Expert”/Yass Kween

The fan favorite of QE, Jonathan’s starring turn as the show’s beauty guru has already led to the creation of a whole new lexicon of iconic sayings, including “Can you believe?” and “Strugs to func.”

Jonathan embraces everyone’s beauty, turning ugly ducklings into majestic, sexy, well-groomed swans.

We cannot get enough of this man. Please, please adopt us.

Favorite Moment: ALL OF THEM!

There are literally so many, we could not choose just one favorite moment.

4. Tan: “Fashion Expert”/Patterned Shirt Aficionado

Tan is the ultimate sweetheart. Though he is, without a doubt, a fashion expert, Tan knows that the key to style is feeling good about yourself inside and out. This quote says it all: “Style is not fashion. Fashion is not trendy after a season. I couldn’t give a sh*t about fashion. Style is dressing the way that you feel confident, and what is appropriate for you, your age [and] body type.”

Favorite Moment: Episode 2, “Saving Sasquatch”

The moment when Tan and Neal bond over their cultural similarities.

5. Antoni: “Food & Wine Expert”/Eye Candy

Ugh, where to start? Antoni is living proof that you can cook up a mean grilled cheese for one and still be bougie af #CollegeInspiration.

Not to mention: I really didn’t think that “supreming” a grapefruit could be sexy but alas, I was wrong.

By the end of the season, we think you’ll agree that Antoni’s feelings about avocados = OUR feelings about him ;).

Favorite Moment: Episode 6, “The Renaissance of Remington”

Antoni making mac n’ cheese with Remy’s mom will make your heart melt like a hunk of cheddar on a hot griddle. This boy knows how to woo a mama.

*swoons*

Now that you’ve met the Fab 5, we hope you take their advice to heart and become the best you that you can be. “Queer Eye” is the show of a modern America, one nation under Fab, all together.

 Whether you’re black, white, straight, gay, or however you identify, “Queer Eye” is here for us all.

So what are you waiting for? Pretend to sexile your roommate, snuggle up under those blankies, open Netflix, and start watching.

*curtsies*

Photos/Gifs: giphy.com, netflix.com, 

Georgetown Is Getting a New Beer Hall!

Finally, some good news that doesn’t involve rats in our favorite dining establishments nor our dilapidated on-campus housing is gracing our school. The Georgetown neighborhood is getting a brand-new bar in the form of Church Hall, which is slated to open at 1070 Wisconsin Ave NW this Friday!

Though Piano Bar, Chi Di and The Tombs have all had their fair shares of the limelight, we’ve all truly been craving a new spot in our Georgetown bubble. And while there are other similar establishments around D.C. like Penn Social, Church Hall, which is a Penn Quarter hangout spot from the same proprietors as Penn Social, promises to be a special place, and 4E is here to tell you why.

  1. Monday to Friday 4 to 7 p.m. happy hours. Sounds really happy to me! With essentially all drafts, wines, and rail drinks for $2, this place is giving Mai Thai a run for its money on their delicious yet probably overpriced pitchers.

    4 to 7***
  2. Gin and tonic. On draft. They say G&Ts are an acquired taste, and I feel like if they’re on draft I just may acquire a taste for them.
  3. Boozy slushies. Need I say more?
  4. 28 Beers on draft. Even all of the craft beer snobs should be able to find something that suits their taste at this place. And if not, the beers rotate regularly, so there will surely be an opportunity for everyone.
  5. A prime location near M Street.  Within the bubble, there aren’t too many options for going out. Without having to trek to AdMo or U Street, we like the idea of another option nearby campus.
  6. An opportunity to relive study abroad. For all those who attended Oktoberfest or Springfest, you know how satisfying lederhosen and a stein of your favorite brew can be. We just needed the right atmosphere to relive this memory.
  7. Another option. Because sometimes, you just get tired of the weekly Tombs-ChiDi-AdMo rotation.

See those of you (21+, of course) there!

Photos/GIFS: giphy.com, chicagofoodmagazine.com