You Are What You Eat: What Your Georgetown Dining Preference Says About You

Let’s be honest: Georgetown isn’t exactly known for its food. (Fun fact: Niche.com ranked us 1,017 out of 1,384  schools in its 2017 rankings for the “Best College Food in America”).

Nevertheless, with the renovation of an upper level of Leo’s that only flooded once this year and the addition of Chick-fil-A, we shouldn’t be complaining too much. And with all these new eateries come new types of people. Here are all of the different types of hungry Hoyas you’ll see throughout the Hilltop.

5 Spice

Probably an ex-boarding school student, this person is a veteran of Chinese takeout, constantly ordering the chicken fried rice, egg rolls and fried pork dumplings. Perhaps 5 Spice isn’t as luxurious as Shanghai Lounge, but with limited flex dollars you gotta ball on a budget with those meal swipes and make the most of it. You’ll probably never see this person actually eating in Leo’s — they’re most likely munching away at their sesame chicken while playing League of Legends or watching the basketball game on their laptop.

Sazón

One of the most annoying eaters, a Sazón lover is that person screaming when “Despacito” comes on in a sweaty Henle. This person probably studied abroad and applied to live in a Spanish LLC after getting an A- in Intermediate II. Oh, and did they mention they studied abroad? The yellow rice from Sazón must have cultured them and ingrained both some ~diversity~ and ~perspective~.

Bodega

This one’s a joke. Does anyone even eat here? Although I’ve never seen a line here, I imagine a Bodega lover is the type of person you’d see on a Georgetown brochure — organized, studious, disciplined and never puking off a Vil A rooftop on Georgetown Day.

Olive Branch

Found in a Moncler coat and some hipster glasses, the standard Olive Branch customer is either a faux Italian or an expat who believes  a ham, feta and spinach pizza really reflects their ~international status~. You’ll often find this person hanging out with the same three people every single day. Catch them at Sax or some bourgeois club away from us plebeians who don’t have cool accents.

Downstairs Leo’s

You should always eat with this person, as they probably have zero standards for food and therefore will never complain about your cooking. The typical Downstairs Leo’s customer has both a large heart and stomach and probably complains about the small portion sizes at 5 Spice while defending the integrity of Georgetown mice — “They’re not even that bad.” These people are the least uptight and most carefree people you’ll  meet in your life — a nice change of pace from the SFS kid who reminds you of his internship every day in class or that one freshman who claims she needs to live in a Henle or Vil B next year.

Crop Chop

“Did I tell you I don’t eat complex carbs?” A regular Crop Chop fanatic will often be found ordering a kale salad inundated with a sour vinaigrette dressing. You can often spot Crop Chop lovers in Lululemon leggings on the way to Yates. If they don’t remind you  they’re vegan or complain that “greasy” upstairs Leo’s promotes college obesity and unhealthy living,  consider yourself lucky.

Royal Jacket

You should envy this person. How does someone have so much time to wait 30 minutes in line for a turkey and cheese sandwich? God forbid this person be found in Lau. Lauinger? Never heard of her. You’ll only spot them in the bourgeois resorts of Regents or working arduously in the MSB.

And of course, we mustn’t forget the majority of Hoyas who will be found drunkenly ordering Insomnia Cookies or Wingos in the late hours of the weekend. Good luck on your exams and happy eating!

Sources: niche.com, giphy.com

What Your Favorite La Croix Flavor Says About You

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La Croix: It can be found in any Georgetown Girl’s refrigerator, but no one really knows how to pronounce it … La Croy? La Cwah? La Crocs? For those of us who love this sparkling beverage, here’s what your preferred flavor says about you.

Pamplemousse and Cran-Raspberry : Although all flavors of La Croix are basic, these two are the worst of them all. You wear Adidas Superstars and Lululemon leggings and drink La Croix to ~rehydrate~ after SoulCycle. You use La Croix as a chaser for your Mango Pineapple Svedka because it’s “healthy.”

Any of the Curate Flavors: You’re really bougie and probably pronounce it “La Cwah.”

Plain: You’re a real hardo. You’d prefer to drink plain water out of your Brita filter but you drink plain La Croix to seem jazzy.

Coconut: Some may say it tastes like a candle, but if you drink Coconut La Croix, you’re the cool kid at the party. You’re super trendy and fun and everyone wants to be your friend (disclaimer: this is my flavor of preference).

Lime: You’re trying to cut back on soda and if you really pretend, it tastes nothing kinda like Sprite.

Peach-Pear: You really like Burnett’s, but since it isn’t socially acceptable to drink on a Tuesday at 1 p.m., Peach-Pear La Croix is the closest you’re going to get.

So, next time you walk around campus with a can of La Croix in hand, just know that the rest of us are judging you.

Photos: lacroixwater.com, www.brit.co

9 Reasons Why We Love The Farmers Market

Banner - FarmersAh, Wednesdays. It’s a special type of day… not only because we’ve gotten through half of the week, but also because our generous university has gifted us with the deliciousness that is the Farmers Market. Here are nine reasons we are in love with it – is your favorite on the list?

  1. That Incredible Pizza

The Timber Pizza Company hits it out the park every time. You can get an amazing wood-fired pizza that’s classic cheese, pepperoni or veggie/pesto-style. Any way you order it, the pizza is so fresh and delicious that no one would judge you if you got right back in line for another.

2. It’s Not From Leo’s
Let’s face it, you need to avoid it at all costs a break once in a while.

3. Churros. Stuffed. With. Nutella.
Quite honestly, there’s little to nothing I would rather have right now. The name says it all.

4. Rita’s To-Die-For Crepes

They start out with the perfect crepe, and from there you can go savory or sweet – or both!

5. The Dumplings
Pinch’s handmade Chinese dumplings will never let you down. As my official go-to farmers market meal, I highly recommend these little pockets of perfection.

6. Melties

The combination of warm cookies and ice cream will make you want to cry the happiest tears of joy.

7. Swizzler’s ~Gourmet~ Hot Dogs
I said gourmet, right? I’ll bet you haven’t had a hot dog this fancy in your life. So do yourself a favor and treat yo’ self.

8. The Ambiance
You gotta love the happy, heart-warming atmosphere on Copley Lawn every Wednesday. Break out that picnic blanket, grab some friends and get out there!

9. You’re Slowly Becoming More Of An Adult

What? Is that you buying fruit and bread for breakfast, carrying around grocery bags, and providing for yourself? Props to you, you fully functioning adult!

Photos/Gifs: giphy.com, gufarmersmarket.org

Read This If You Like Tacos

chaia11Do you like tacos? Do you (possibly begrudgingly, as I do) self-identify as a foodie-slash-hipster who likes wholesome dining experiences in buildings that feature exposed white bricks and glossy wood paneling? Have you ever wanted to experience “chai” without it being a descriptor of tea?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, then 4E has good news for you!

Tomorrow, a new farm-to-table taco restaurant called Chaia will be opening in Georgetown. The eatery, which is located at 3207 Grace Street, will feature several fresh and vegetarian options in its brand spanking new bright white space.

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See? Look how shiny and hipstery this is!

Also, if you’re like me and have no idea where Grace Street is located, here is a Google Map that will serve to guide you to Chaia’s taco goodness.

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Grace Street… Who knew?

Happy eating, folks! Be sure to check out The Hoya in the coming days for a full restaurant review of Chaia.

Photos: dc.eater.com, maps.google.com

Real or Fake: Trader Joe’s Food

hd_3154df63b110dad9e02b2bbb4bd7d44cTrader Joe’s: the holy grail for college kids without meal plans, yo-pro couples and fun-loving elderly folks. Put on your thinking cap and Hawaiian lei and test your knowledge of America’s punniest grocery store. How familiar are you with original Trader Joe’s food? One of the answers for each question is the name of a real Trader Joe’s food item; the rest of the options are made up by a troll on Lau 2 who didn’t own a sports bra until junior year of high school when she had to buy one for a school play.

CHIPOTLE ON WHEELS

addicted-chipotle-burritoOlé, olé!

How many times have you been sitting in your dorm room – wrapped up in blankets and avoiding your responsibilities – and thought to yourself, “Wow! I could really go for a Chipotle burrito right now.”

You immediately come up with 400 reasons not to go to Chipotle: it’s 0.56 miles away, it’s either too hot or cold, there’s a 10% chance of rain, you just put on your ugliest sweatpants…

Okay. We get it. But now, 4E is coming to the rescue with some AMAZING news: you can now order Chipotle directly to your dorm using the Postmates app!

While this news has been known to the lucky few for the last months (including one of our own bloggers; see below), we thought we’d go public with this tremendous information.

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So now you can have Chipotle anywhere with just a few clicks! Goodbye money, hello burritos.

Photos/Gifs: secretmenu.com, mtv.com

The Ultimate Ben & Jerry’s and Netflix Pairing Menu

Netflix Ice Cream

There are many things that go hand in hand without need for explanation. Football and Thanksgiving, Lau 2 and procrastination, Burnett’s and regrets, winter and leggings, Leo’s and sickness, Rhino and freshmen. But one of the most important of all of these is a good ol’ pint of Ben & Jerry’s and your go-to Netflix show. We at 4E have enough experience to provide you with a proper menu for pairing the perfect flavor with the perfect show.

“House of Cards” and Americone Dream:  What better way to celebrate ‘MERICA and its politically corrupt president in “House of Cards” with a vanilla, caramel, chocolate swirl waffle cone infused pint of B&J. You’ll be scooping mouthfuls of this stuff as you observe Frank mercilessly and oh so cleverly battle his way to the top.

“Gilmore Girls” and Raspberry Chocolate Chunk Froyo:  You may need a little something for comfort as you ceaselessly fret over the future of Lorelai and Luke or Rory’s incessant complaints over her boy troubles. This is where a pint of delicious raspberry froyo sprinkled with chocolate chunks comes into play. Better yet, the fact that it’s froyo and says raspberry on the label makes it healthy enough to fit into the diet you started this morning.

“Weeds” and Half Baked:  With recent legalization laws in place, it’s only fitting that you celebrate with a classic stoner show and some ice cream to help with the munchies. This flavor is not very complicated, but it’s oh so good with its chunks of gooey cookie dough that your pint will be gone in no time.

“Scandal” and Karamal Sutra:  Not only will the title of this ice cream make you feel a little scandalous, but its rich caramel chocolatey core may also get you all hot and bothered. Maybe this is what you need to embrace your inner Olivia Pope and her fierceness. ¡Muy escandalosa!

“It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia” and Hazed and Confused:  What better way to watch the debauchery of these five underachievers with a little, scratch that, a lot of Ben & Jerry’s Hazed and Confused. Like this show, this ice cream combines everything that is good in life into a pint of pure bliss (hazelnut and chocolate). Beware: this show does involve hysterical laughing and tears of happiness, so remember to eat your ice cream in between episodes or during commercials.

Gif: Giphy; Photos: whattofix.com, netflix.com

ShopHouse Bounceback: Buy a Burrito, Get a Free Bowl

ShopHouse Free Bowl

We here at 4E have observed over the years that Georgetown students — us included — love Chipotle. And why shouldn’t they? It just makes sense that college kids’ would be obsessed with a place that sells relatively cheap, incredibly filling, delicious food.

Similarly, Chipotle’s sister, ShopHouse, serves up food inspired by Thai and Vietnamese cuisine, and has been offering promotion after promotion the past couple of months.

And now there’s a new one: Every Saturday in November — starting today — if you bring in a receipt from Chipotle (for a bowl, burrito, taco or salad) to any ShopHouse location from 11 a.m. to 10 p.m., you will get a free ShopHouse bowl. That’s right. In exchange for going to Chipotle — something that is a part of many people’s weekly routines — you can get FREE FOOD!

Of course, as we’ve told you before, you can make your own bowl at ShopHouse (and with a Chipotle receipt, it’ll be free!). Or you can try one of the four new “House Favorites”, which are premade combinations designed to tantalize the taste buds. So grab your Chipotle receipt from Wednesday (we know you have them) and head on over to your local ShopHouse (2805 M Street NW) to get your free bowl.

Photo: siliconbeachclearly.com

Hump Day Chomp: Dukem

humpdaychomp

Hump Day Chomp is a new weekly posting that intends, perhaps unsuccessfully, to make your Hump day a bit less humpy. We’ve found restaurants that are (mostly) cheap, rarely visited by our Georgetown amigos and, above all, pretty freaking good to get you through the week. 

I bet you’ve said, “Mmmm I’m craving Ethiopian” about as much as you’ve said, “I need a colonoscopy”, so today’s Hump Day Chomp is written with the intention of changing your mentality. With over 250,000 Ethiopian residents, DC boasts a large number of great Ethiopian restaurants that are cheap, laid-back and Hump Day Chomp-worthy.

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I recently visited Dukem, a small Ethiopian restaurant on U St. Corridor. (You can get to U St. by taking the metro to the U Street-Cardozo Metro Station on the green line.) The restaurant is really casual and cozy, and has a chill terrace facing the bustling area. Dukem serves different types of Ethiopian foods, like fitfit and kitfo, as well as God-knows-what for you vegetarians, but their specialty is Ethiopian injera with wat.

Injera is kind of like a spongy crepe that doubles as a plate to serve a variety of meats, cheeses and vegetables. We ordered a platter of warm injera with a colorful combination of different stews that came in less than 10 minutes and was so big it could barely fit the table. The combination platters are about $20, and are enough to feed an average indigenous Guatemalan family, which, for your information, is 5.2 people. All right, maybe it’s enough to feed just 2 or 3 of you, but that’s still pretty damn cheap.

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The best part? FINGER FOOOOOOOOOOOODDDD. Ethiopians eat exclusively with their right hands, so utensils aren’t even given to you unless you ask for them. You’re supposed to eat whatever you ordered by using pieces of injera to pick up the meats, cheeses and vegetables on top of it. Be warned that these foods have a lot of spices, so some of you might have bowel problems à la Ben Stiller in “Along Came Polly.”

I hope your Hump Day is less humpy than mine, and if it’s not, then stop complaining and go eat with your hands!

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Photos: quickmeme.com, pandawhale.com, blogspot.com

Let’s Go Round Two: 4E’s Guide to Winter Brunching

Brunch it upThere are very few people in the world who can turn down a good waffle or a delicious sandwich. But what if you could have them both at the same time? This, my friends, is the beauty of brunch. Brunch is one of my all time favorite meals because brunch food is the best food. Nay, brunch is more than that: It is a lifestyle.

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The best part about winter brunching is getting to sit inside and warm up. And drink hot coffee. Man, I love me some coffee.

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Despite its fun facade, brunching can be tricky at times. Here are some tips on how to prepare:

1. Make sure to check out our tips for champagne brunching (The tips are pretty much applicable here, minus the alcohol, of course). The most important of these tips is to make reservations. Brunch places always get crowded and are often occupied by big groups. Be smart and call ahead.

2. Figure out how you are going to get there. Are you walking or riding? Uber or taxi? (In some cases cab rides can get super expensive.)

3. Dress to impress, but don’t dress to freeze. Yes, your sundress may be cute, but it does not make any sense when it is 25 degrees and snowing outside.

4. Go hungry. This may seem obvious, but sometimes people do not take advantage of the greatness of brunch. It will be better if you are hungry.

5. Try not to go with a huge group. While it can be fun, the bill often is unthinkably large and difficult to divide up. The smaller the group, the less stress. Brunch should not be a stressful activity.

Now the question is, where should you go?

In Georgetown:

Tombs (1226 36th St. NW) A classic and a favorite. Tombs’ location is ideal for the lazy college student but is up to par with many places in downtown D.C. Its fireplace makes for a warm atmosphere and its coffee cake is the best. (Entrees usually around $11.00)

Farmers Fishers Bakers (3000 K St. NW) For those brunchers who want to have a fancier meal, Farmers Fishers Bakers offers amazing food at a set price. Its location on the Georgetown waterfront near the ice skating rink makes for the perfect winter afternoon. Because nothing says cute and wintry like brunch and ice skating. (Set price of $29.99)

Outside the bubble:

Founding Farmers (1924 Pennsylvania Ave. NW) Located in Foggy Bottom, this is a favorite for many Georgetown students (especially me!). All of the food is natural and delicious. (Entrees $9-$12)

Montmarte (327 7th St. SE) Located right near the Flea Market at Eastern Market, this brunch favorite offers both food and the possibility of shopping! Talk about the perfect Sunday. Word to the wise: the mussels are divine! (Entrees $11-$14) 

Once you get to your location, here are some tips to make the most of your winter brunch:

1. Don’t just commit to one meal. The best part of brunch is the mix of breakfast and lunch! Find someone who will split eggs and a chicken sandwich with you. That is love.

2. Take cute pictures. Most of us do not have the luxury of going brunching every single weekend. So make sure to document it and relive it at a later date. Instagram away. #brunchingwiththehomies

3. All you can eat. I repeat: All you can eat. Brunch is two meals. Breakfast. And. Lunch. Do not treat it like your afternoon snack. This is the time to chow down, and no one will judge you.

The time has come: Gather your friends, sit back and enjoy some yummy food amidst this disgusting weather.

tumblr_mmgcnjg5qW1qd243po1_500Oh my gawwwd, YUM.

Gifs: tumblr.com; Photo: stlouis.cbslocal.com