#WasteHisTime2016

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If you have WiFi in that rock you’ve been living under for the last few weeks, you’ve probably seen this hashtag trending on Twitter: #WasteHisTime2016. Basically girls (and probably guys because, equality) are tweeting ways that they waste guys’ time. Hopefully they don’t do this on a regular basis — because that’s mean. To hop on the bandwagon, we at 4E have come up with some of our own ways to waste someone’s time:

Make my brother into a diehard Georgetown Basketball fan. #WasteHisTime2016

Tell a drunken hookup to take the elevator to the fifth floor of Copley (when you live somewhere else). #WasteHisTime2016

Take someone on a first date to Leo’s. #WasteHisTime2016

Crack jokes about the preppy guy style that’s ubiquitous on Georgetown’s campus. #WasteHisTime2016

Debate Jack DeGioia on his hover board ban. #WasteHisTime2016

Train Jack the Bulldog to hover board across the Verizon Center. #WasteHisTime2016

Keep talented freshman center Jessie Govan on the bench. #WasteHisTime2016

Make a friend listen to how busy you are all the time because evidently no one else is ever busy. Ever. It’s just you. #WasteHisTime2016

Email your study buddy: “Want to trade study guides?” Then, don’t return the favor. #WasteHisTime2016

Ask your professor to explain something that he literally just explained. #WasteHisTime2016

Ask a question in the last 0.005 seconds of class so everyone has to stay. #WasteHisTime2016

Repeatedly ask your dog “Who’s a good boy?” but never tell him the answer. #WasteHisTime2016

Take your visiting long distance boyfriend to Piano Bar. #WasteHisTime2016

Take a visiting friend who’s in a frat at a state school to a Georgetown Party. #WasteHisTime2016

Brag to your bros back home — who all go to football schools — about how cool Georgetown Day is. #WasteHisTime2016

Make him watch Season 4 of Arrested Development (sorry). #WasteHisTime2016

 

Twitter is fun but tormenting people is terrible. Be careful!

Photos: telegraph.co.uk

Best of #BernieAtGU

 

Robert Cortes/The Hoya
Robert Cortes/The Hoya

If you missed Bernie in Gaston today, don’t worry, 4E has all the updates from his speech today. Check out some tweets below!

 

 

https://twitter.com/jlupf/status/667439086827937792

(Free) ICE CREAM ON WHEELS

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Okay Georgetown: how many times have you said, “I would kill for a pint of ice cream right now” or “If you bring me a pint of ice cream right now I’ll love you forever”?

Well now you can have ice cream delivered to your very own (office) door without the potential for jail time or a life-long attachment. Spread the word: Ben and Jerry’s ice cream trucks are on tour around DC delivering free scoops.

All you have to do is tweet them your location (@BenJerrysTour) and, according to their Twitter, they will come make your wildest dreams come true.

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For those of you Ben and Jerry’s noobs, here are a few flavor recommendations:

Americone Dream (duh, Happy 4th)
Coffee Toffee Bar Crunch
Peanut Butter Cup
Phish Food
Half Baked

Bonus points to whoever gets the truck closest to campus. You have until the 18th to make this dream a reality. Get tweeting, Hoyas!

Photos/Gifs: Huffington Post, Twitter.com

Georgetown for Gender Equality

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BREAKING NEWS:

What do Twitter, Vodaphone and Georgetown all have in common?!
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Yeah, buddy at first we were stumped to, but it’s:

GENDER EQUALITY.

As part of Emma Watson’s…

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(Well yes, her, but really more her)

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Anyway… As part of Emma Watson’s He for She campaign, major companies and universities have commit to joining in and taking concrete steps toward gender equality as part of the UNWomen’s IMPACT 10x10x10 initiative. We here at 4E are glad to hear it!

In fact, if you see John DeGioia around campus we urge you to give him a huge shout out for his pledge to advance gender equality through “the research compiled by Georgetown’s Institute for Women, Peace & Security, which will soon unveil a new study on women’s political participation in ending conflict” as well as “implemented a new on-campus education program to help students and faculty identify harassment and sexual misconduct”, and for the overall mention in TIME!

Check out the complete article here!!

And, a last HOORAY!

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Photos/Gifs: giphy.com

WBC Protest, As Told By Social Media

WBC

Unless you were abroad or in some Georgetown-day induced coma, you know that the Westboro Baptist Church visited our dear Hilltop yesterday. Their presence created quite a ruckus, leading to both a counter-protest and a solidarity event. Through both forms of expression, Georgetown students demonstrated their sentiments toward this event.

However, there was another way in which Georgetown students expressed their emotions: social media!

At first, many were confused what they were even doing there.

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Many were not feeling WBC’s presence, especially since it was the last day of classes.

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Tons of people showed up 3 hours early to capture the whole event…

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Todd Olson even showed up to show his support! (read: HAYYYY)

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And then the Instagrams began, capturing the occasion in a #artsy way.

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Some tried to bring comedy into the mix…

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The signs used by the WBC and their supporters were probably the most ridiculous part.

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But no matter the form the posts took, there was no doubt that Georgetown students were beyond proud of the support both the counter and the solidarity protests received.

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Photos: Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Snapchat

Tweets on Fleek

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Twitter has been on fleek lately, even though a lot of popular accounts have just been sharing the same jokes – I’m looking at you, @CommonWhiteGirl, @FillWerrell and @GirlPosts. Lame!

Despite this trend toward social media plagiarism, there are some really great accounts that have totally original tweets and concepts. Here are a few of our favorites:

@GeorgetownGnome chronicles his ceramic life in 140 characters or less. Most recently, he has journeyed to Afghanistan where he has fraternized with an Afghan Shepherd (their slightly less cute version of the lovely German Shepherd) and gone for a ride on a military tank.

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@RealCarrotFacts provides life advice and commentary on hot cultural topics while bemoaning the lost love of his life, the mysterious Megan. Don’t be turned off by the misspellings and lack of punctuation; he’s just a carrot, he’s still learning.

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@WolfPupy is the sassiest little canine on Twitter. It includes deep insights on such topics as breakfast, dinosaurs and life itself. This one is hard to categorize; you definitely have to check it out to experience the comedic genius.

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@MedievalReactions is a relatively new account – with only 11 tweets – but it combines appreciation for medieval art with modern sentiments. Screen Shot 2015-03-24 at 7.20.21 PM

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Next time you want to see a gnome driving a military helicopter, a sexy carrot or a three-hundred-year-old nude painting, check out these hilarious handles.

Photos: twitter.com; softpedia-static.com

Free Nutella

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Between now and Feb. 17 you can tweet a picture of Nutella pancakes @Nutella using the hashtag #NutellaPancakeSweeps and you’ll be entered to win a coupon for a free jar of Nutella!

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Leo’s puts out Nutella every once in a blue moon, so whether you get the opportunity to snap a pic and devour the delicious pancakes remains to be seen.

This promotion is probably in celebration of World Nutella Day, which, for you uncultured commoners, is TODAY!

Here are a few ways to celebrate Nutella Day – which, by the way, should be celebrated everyday:

Nutella cinnamon rolls (just get the ready-made kind from Vittles and drown them in Nutella)

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Banana Nutella smoothie

Nutella and peanut butter sandwich with bacon

Nutella milkshake (you can get one at the Bulldog Tavern)

Bacon covered in Nutella

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Nutella and banana croissants (Pillsbury crescent roll dough with sliced banana and heaps of Nutella rolled inside)

If none of these suggestions moved you, you can always just grab a jar and a spoon. Go to the grocery store, get tweeting and enjoy World Nutella Day!

Photos: Nutella; Buzzfeed.com; firstcovers.com

Georgetown Improv: How Are They Single?

improv

Georgetown Improv’s first show of 2015 is tomorrow, Jan. 24, at 9 p.m. in Bulldog Alley. Please, try to control your excitement!

I had the privilege of sitting down (well, standing at the front desk in Davis) with four members of the improv team – Connor Rohan (COL’ 16), Joe Luther (COL’ 16), Thomas Moakley (SFS ’17) and Caitlin Cleary (COL ’16). (The other members are Gabe Bolio, Alex Mitchell and Emlyn Crenshaw.)

4E: Where are you guys from?
Thomas: Cape Cod. Fun fact: it’s actually fifteen towns. I’m from Falmouth – people say it’s a scientific community, but I just call it home.
Connor: I’m from Bethlehem, New York, which is actually made of hamlets.
Joe: I’m from River Forest, Illinois. It was found in the 1870s during the railroad boom when wealthy people were looking to get out of the slums. It’s a slum haven. A slaven.
Thomas: Caitlin is stateless. She doesn’t belong anywhere.

Caitlin comes in late, cheeks pink from running. She has a slight cold, which only serves to make her the most beautiful woman the group has ever seen. (-Caitlin)

4E: Are you guys ever nervous during a show?
Connor: I get nervous when the audience isn’t responding, even if I’m not in the skit.
Joe: Yeah, but I’m comforted by the fact that there’s seven of us.
Thomas: I get nervous moments before the show but during it, we rely on each other. Except Gabe, who likes to eat with his “friends” at Leo’s instead of with me.
Caitlin: I get really nervous before shows. We do the warm up song and if it weren’t for the warm up song I wouldn’t be able to do the show.
Joe: Being on stage is kind of like being blackout –
Caitlin: But without the shame –
Joe: In that it’s a ton of fun but you don’t remember anything.

4E: How did you guys get into improv? Did you know you were funny?
Connor: Well I actually went to George Mason, so I was involved in a similar group there.
Joe: Like yeah I know I’m funny, but I don’t like to say it.
Thomas: I did acting in high school.
Caitlin: My roommate forced me to audition.

4E: If you could have any celebrity guest join you for a show, who would it be?
Caitlin: I think the best people to have in an improv show would be people that you don’t think are funny… like maybe Donald Trump.
Thomas: Pope Francis so he could finally tell people who impersonate the pope using an Italian accent that the pope hasn’t been Italian since 1976.
Joe: Thomas has a crush on [Massachusetts Governor] Charlie Baker.
Thomas: I used to have a crush on John Boehner for three reasons: his hair looks really soft, he has really nice eyes and he’s got nice tie knots.
Caitlin: That’s what I look for in a leader.
Connor: I’ve heard you say so much about politicians but I’ve never heard you talk about policies.
Caitlin: Thomas has a Boehner boner.

4E: How do you prepare for shows since none of it is rehearsed?
Caitlin: We don’t have rehearsals, we have practice. For the plebeians reading this, it’s a lot like soccer practice – you learn the skills you’ll use in the game but you can’t rehearse because the game isn’t predictable. Neither is the show.
Thomas: Caitlin is just using a sports analogy so she seems like less of a nerd.
Caitlin: Go Pats! Just kidding, I don’t follow baseball.

4E: Do you guys have like partners that you usually go up with?
Joe: No, it is just based on the chemistry before the show.
Thomas: But it’s usually based on whom you’re comfortable with.
Caitlin: Yeah like it’s about increasing intimacy. The more I get to know these people, the more I realize they’re just full of sh*t. Let that be my quote, literally and figuratively.
Connor: But it really is just who you’re comfortable with – like I probably wouldn’t go up with Caitlin.
Caitlin: We don’t work together. I am the beautiful amphibian that should be allowed to thrive and Connor is the chytrid fungus that destroys me.

Some chatter:

Thomas: Tell them that bipartisanship is important no matter what state you are from. Good luck to Massachusetts’ new governor, Charlie Baker.

Caitlin: Your microbiome contributes more to your immunity than just your immune system.

Joe: So The Hoya just celebrated its 95th birthday.
Thomas: My friend’s grandma would have turned 95 but she died a few weeks ago.

Thomas: Instead of COL next to my name can you write “DMASS” as in Democrat, Massachusetts?
Caitlin: Can you put a U in there so it says “DUMASS” and people know he’s a dumbass?

The cast requests that readers follow the Georgetown Improv on Twitter @georgetownimprov. They also shared their personal Twitter handles:
Joe: @joelu72
Thomas: @tmoaks
Connor: @aspartame_demon

Joe: Do you know the title of this article? You could say, “It seems like it’s so fun to hang out with them!”
Caitlin: Or “How are they single? They’re all great people!”
Thomas: Maybe it’s because Caitlin is so enigmatic. She’s like a unicorn.
Joe: So this is for the blog, but will it make it onto the front page of the paper?
4E: The blog is not even in the newspaper.
Connor: Well fu*k. I think we’re done here.

Be sure to check out Georgetown Improv this Saturday and get ready to fangirl so hard for all of these amazing comedians.

Photos: Georgetown Improv

Party Themes 2.0

Party Themes 2.0

Whiteout. Anything But Clothes. Toga. Flannels and handles. In a report released this afternoon by the Frat Boy Association of America (FBAA), these time-honored, critically acclaimed college party themes have all earned the widely sought-after “ratchet” status.

These findings reveal a lack of innovation across the board. Although these classics never fail to deliver their fair share of jungle juice, Natty, crop tops and shame, we at 4E believe it’s time to make some cutting-edge contributions to today’s antiquated party theme options.

Your Favorite Handle

A good party theme is all about the double entendre/puns. Sport @yourfavoritetwitteraccount on your T-shirt or dress up like your favorite flavor of Burnett’s. Recommendations include @LILBTHEBASEDGOD and @amandabynes. If you go the vodka route, get creative with your flavor choice. Tropical punch, perhaps. Just not maple syrup because we told you that’s disgusting.

I Woke Up Like This

Channel your inner Sasha Fierce or wear slippers and a nightgown. This theme presents a juxtaposition between divas and bedheads that will keep the party interesting. There is also the opportunity to put the absolute maximum or the bare minimum effort into the costume depending on whether you choose to be Bey or a lazy pajama-clad college student for the night. Earn extra points by merging the two and somehow finding a way to pull off being Beyoncé in a onesie.

Basic and Basic

Although the term “basic” has started to grind my gears, it has party theme potential. Either incorporate some chemistry knowledge into your outfit via a cute and flirty pH scale drawing on your tank top or opt for yoga pants and Uggs (with the fur rolled down) while toting around a Starbucks holiday cup.

Middle School Dance and Cargo Pants

This theme aims to take you back to your school gym in the seventh grade. Party attire can include a combination of any of the following elements: Apple Bottom jeans, denim mini skirt, pink Converse, a choker and/or a Juicy Couture track jacket. For the boys, cargo pants with so many pockets that you could simultaneously store all of your Yu-Gi-Oh cards within them. (Also acceptable: those sweatpants with fifteen zippers that allowed one to change from pants to capris to shorts to boxer-length shorts in a few easy unzips). If you’re not chasing your drinks with Sunny D and following those body shots with a sip of Capri Sun, you’re doing it wrong.

And that’s all for now. Use these last days before Thanksgiving to give these themes a try or hold out until your last free weekend before finals. Because you can only dress in ABC so many times before you start to realize it’s cold out.

Photo: noisey.com

We Can Land on a Comet But We Can’t …

Comet Landing

As you may have heard, a few days ago the Rosetta probe successfully landed on a comet. Twitter users had a humorous response to mankind’s latest outer space feat, posting ridiculous things with the hashtag #WeCanLandOnACometButWeCant. We at 4E have compiled our own list of things we can’t do:

We can land on a comet but we can’t …

… get the USB in the port on the first try.

… find Waldo.

… stop Nicholas Cage from making movies.

… find washing machines that don’t eat our socks.

… make another Harry Potter movie.

… prevent the accidental photo like on Instagram.

… listen to Taylor Swift on Spotify.

… lick our elbows.

… dislike a post on Facebook.

… spread out our flex dollars over the semester.

… find out how many licks it takes to get to the center of a Tootsie pop.

… rub our tummies and pat our heads.

… decide whether Diet Coke is better or worse than regular Coke.

… pick up our omelettes when we’re supposed to.

… finish a whole stick of chapstick.

… stop missing Markel Starks.

… give our dominant hands presentable manicures.

… remember where we parked our cars.

… stop watching Snapchat stories.

… keep our headphones untangled.

… get restaurant reservations on Saturday at 8 p.m.

… finish our bottles of shampoo and conditioner at the same time.

… even

We get it, world. There is a comet out there somewhere with a probe on it. We can land on a comet. But just think of all the things we can’t do, and let’s get our priorities straight.

Photo: wikimedia.org