Best Places to Be Dumped on Campus

As cuffing season comes to an end, so will the PDA in freshman common rooms. While many were blessed to already find their soulmates in a sweaty Henle, SOME of us have already accepted our permanent statuses as third wheels (I’m not salty, it’s whatever).

Nonetheless, if you’re thinking of ending it with your significant other, consider these trendy spots on the Hilltop.

1. Lau 1: This is the quiet zone, which means no sounds. No one can hear you cry, and you can save yourself the embarrassment.

2. Leo’s on Chicken Tender Thursday: This is your last chance to be featured on @couplesatleos.

3. Yates at 12:01 AM: Word on the street is that the lights spontaneously shut off promptly at 12:01 AM—whether you like it or not. Now, no one can see you weep or mourn over your short-lived relationship.

4. Epi: I’m sure you’ll make friends with the other heartbroken Hoyas who are drunkenly eating away their feelings with a warm chicken quesadilla.

5. Walsh elevator: At least you’ll be in the cramped comfort of 18 people who chose to wait 12 minutes for an elevator instead of taking the stairs to the 3rd floor.

6. GERMS Truck: Treat your alcohol poisoning AND your heartbreak for the price of one expensive and overrated hospital fee.

But fret not—70% of Hoyas marry Hoyas, right? Its always okay to be a #SingleLady.

Photos/Gifs: giphy.com, stuartschool.org