What Should You Binge-Watch Next?

This time of year, we all get a little burnt out. Take it from someone who has been binge watching reruns of How to Get Away with Murder since August. Netflix is more than a streaming service, it’s a lifestyle choice. Sometimes however, opening the Netflix home page to millions of choices just seems too overwhelming for the stressed-out sleep-deprived college student. Even worse, in a few months Netflix plans to get rid of ratings on its shows! So today, we present you with the definitive 4E Guide to Netflix Binge-Watching. We know. Grab a jar of Nutella and a spoon and thank us later.

Stranger Things 

Rating: 5 hours more of procrastination on that PST paper

A borderline-schizophrenic mother, creepy background music from the 80’s, and aliens (I still don’t know) dominate this genuinely weird show. I have no idea why this is as entertaining as it is, but somehow it just works. Also the cast is woke so you can feel good about watching it.

Santa Clarita Diet

Rating: Three human hearts and a leg.

In this Netflix original, Drew Barrymore is a vampire/zombie/otherwise-undead being that teams up with her husband to kill and eat practically everyone who annoys them. This show also includes inordinate quantities of vomit and lots of references to Medieval Serbia. Not for the easily queasy.

Black Mirror

Rating: Too problematic

This series of unrelated episodes is intellectually mind-boggling in its most intense form. This show has everything: time-traveling lesbians, a urinating bank robber, the Prime Minister of the U.K. having sex with a pig (although I’m not sure that one isn’t real…*cough cough David Cameron cough cough*), and more. Try watching more than two episodes in a row and not doubting everything you know and love.

Lemony Snicket’s A Series of Unfortunate Events

Rating: One burned-down mansion, three genius children and an evil actor

Neil Patrick Harris? Need I say more?

Seriously, this Netflix original puts its movie, and even the books it was based on, to shame. Beautifully whimsical sets are filled with surprise after surprise, each more depressing than the last. Metaphor, allegory and wit abound in a show that casts children as geniuses and adults as absurdly inept.

The show’s theme song tells you not to watch it, that the show is too depressing and nothing good will come from it.

I would agree you shouldn’t watch it, but for a different reason–you won’t get out of bed until you’ve watched the entire first season.

Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt

Rating: 5 mole women

Produced by Tina Fey and some of her colleagues from 30 Rock, Kimmy Schmidt is a hilariously self-aware satire of pop culture. Everything from the stupidity of reality TV to discussion of race relations falls in the writers’ scope, which usually provides lots of laughs while delivering biting criticisms of modern society à la Colbert.

A warning for my friends and family: Don’t expect to see me May 19th, the day the third season of Kimmy Schmidt comes out. I won’t leave my room for food or water and I probably won’t even get up to go to the bathroom until I’ve finished all the episodes.

Photos/gifs: giphy.com, thepennyhoarder.com

Surviving the Sunday Scaries

Surviving the Sunday Scaries

Have a fun, crazy weekend? Feel like you need another one just to recuperate from your weekend? Are you currently in bed scooping handfuls of Nutella into your mouth as you procrastinate on your first course reading with Netflix’s “Stranger Things” stressing about your upcoming week?

If this is your current status, then you’re suffering from what 4E likes to call the Sunday Scaries. According to Urban Dictionary, the Sunday Scaries is defined as “the dreadful feeling on a Sunday morning after a long hard week of boozing … regret,the shakes, having no money left in your wallet and spending the day hugging the porcelain throne are all common symptoms.”

Yes, fellow Hoyas, the Sunday Scaries is very much a real epidemic that must be addressed and 4E is here to do just that. Please read the following if you or a loved one are seeking help.

  1. Drink more! No no, I am not talking about alcohol here! Get your shakey self over to Wisey’s and make sure to buy some Gatorade or anything with electrolytes. And while you’re at it, buy yourself a bacon, egg and cheese too.
  2. No Ragrets! Even though you may be regretting the previous two days and how you spent that precious time, live in the now. You only live once, so get yourself together and revel in your current period of relative freedom.
  3. Treat yo self! You have probably put your body through some pretty rough things the past 48 hours, so get yourself a good meal to put some nutrients into your body. Hit up Mai Thai, or if you want to be really healthy, splurge on Sweetgreen. 
  4. Don’t look at your bank account! You’re not ready for this sad, sad realization, so save the “checking your bank statement episode of horror” for Monday.
  5. Get your sh** together! Now that you’re somewhat put together, spend some time cranking out that assignment you forgot was due tomorrow.

With these five potentially difficult but very feasible steps, you can overcome that heart wrenching feeling called the Sunday Scaries. 4E recommends that you do have a a jar of nutella at the ready for those inevitable moments of weakness.

Images: giphy.com, http://bit.ly/2bHbDZE

Bed, Bath & Beyond Blacklisted: The Unofficial Back to School List

Back to School List

As most of you are packing up your rooms at home or just moving out of your apartments from your internship/summer job days, you’re probably asking yourself: “Am I missing anything?” While this packing process is quite overwhelming, the answer to that question is “Yes.” Yes, you are definitely missing a few back-to-college essentials that we can GUARANTEE you haven’t thought of.

If you are returning to the Hilltop, you may have realized that these items were necessary for your first few days at Georgetown, but for those of you who are new, you will be happy that you came across yet another 4E guide!

Here is our ~unofficial~ back to school list: 

Bottle-opener key chain: This item is essential for two reasons.

1. You need something to put your new dorm key on because you do not want to lose it! That $100 lost key charge could be better spent on Wisey’s sandwiches and Saxby’s cold brew! Also, you should probably lose the lanyard A$AP (that’s just 4E’s advice).

2. Once you have ditched that pesky lanyard you got at NSO, a bottle opener key chain will def prove handy when you are out and about “exploring” Georgetown.

This is NOT the guy who gets invited back next weekend. You've been warned.
This is NOT the guy who gets invited        back next weekend. You’ve been                                warned.

Extended phone charger: This item may not sound very cool, but trust me, it is essential when you know you’ll be either sleeping in bunk beds or lofted beds for the next few years. There is nothing worse than having to wake up with no battery on your phone or laying in bed and having to get up to charge it. #FirstWorldProblems

A big-a** bottle of Advil/Ibuprofen: This, my young friends, will be your saving grace. While you should drink water instead of resorting to Advil for those headaches (we won’t discuss how you got those!), we just recommend you have some a lot at hand. You will thank 4E later.

“Uh, and if you don’t know,                                now you know…”

Anything but a mesh trash can: Put quite simply, there will be some unsightly things entering that trash can this year. You don’t want anything leaking on the floor now, do you?

A 21-year-old “friend”: I don’t think I need to explain why this connection is something essential when stepping onto campus as an underclassman.

BETTER YET!

A fellow freshman with an older sibling at Georgetown: Who better to inform you, you youngin’, of the ins and outs of Georgetown than a living, breathing Hoya? (Answer: 4E, duh. We have all the answers.)

Blotting papers: Listen up – everyone will benefit from purchasing a pack of these to slide in your wallet. D.C. humidity is NOT – I repeat – NOT a joke. Things get sweaty real quick. Stay on top of your game. A great way to earn friends is to ensure they remain as put together as one can when braving the 85 and muggy temperatures of the Hilltop nightfall.

A Costco size jar of Nutella: Take it from someone who knows; there is nothing better to late-night binge eat than a heaping spoonful of Nutella. Unless that spoon has previously been dipped in some Skippy and you’re now slathering the entire mess onto a Double Stuffed Oreo.

Felt this in my loins.
Felt this in my loins.

A taste for the finer things: Leo’s brunch and plastic bottles of Burnetts now await you. Gone are the days of buying an 18-pack of Bud Light at your town bodega. Natty Light is your drink of choice now. Get used to it.

We are 99 percent sure this scene was actually shot in Leo’s during Sunday brunch hour.

A dictionary: However, in this case, a Webster simply won’t do. Brush up on your Georgetown lingo before arriving on the Hilltop with this 4E helping hand. Who’s lost in translation? Not you!

Your best smile :) It’s like Annie always said, “You’re never fully dressed without a smile!” The best years of your life await you. Greet them with open arms and you’ll reap the benefits.

Images: giphy.com, http://bit.ly/2biBWVK 

Where Should You Spring Break?

Banner - Break QuizHave you ever wondered what exotic location is your spirit location. Well, look no further. In honor of Spring Break (and procrastinating midterms), 4E is asking you to ponder: Where should you ~actually~ go for your break?

Photos: letsgovr.com

 

7 Things You Should Steal From Leo’s

junk_foodStudents are constantly stealing cutlery, plates, cups and bowls from the Leo’s. It’s so commonplace that staff members at Leo’s basically look the other way if you walk out with a cup of coffee or bowl of ice cream. If you haven’t yet had the chance to say a nice “screw you” to the most absurdly over-priced and under-achieving establishment on campus, think about taking a few of these items.

The popcorn machine
No team movie night is complete without copious amounts of salty, buttery, cardboard-y popcorn. Bonus points if you take the shakers of flavors and the little red and white popcorn boxes.

Big bags of cereal
In the cabinets under the cereal dispensers downstairs are massive bags of your favorite breakfast foods: Captain Crunch, Coco Puffs and Cinnamon Toast Crunch… to name a few. Grabbing a bag = breakfast for your housemates for a week.

The waffle maker
On the off chance that the waffle maker is actually available, grab it and run.

A giant tub of Nutella
Another item that’s only on display occasionally, a tub of this chocolate-y, hazelnut-y goodness can take your toast and fruit to the next level.

A chair
Thank goodness Leo’s replaced those ratty old plastic tables and chairs upstairs with beautiful maple farmhouse tables. The sides of the old tables were so pointy that they once tore a 4E blogger’s down jacket right open. The new chairs are echelons better than the desk chairs supplied in freshman dorms. Take one this week – just in time for finals!

The salad bar
Healthy food is always the answer, whether you’re looking for something to energize you for a fun day or help you recover from a hangover. The upstairs salad bar has wheels so you can easily push it through the front door. When you consume the edible greens and vegetables, the bar can serve as a display for your favorite stuff or a table for alcohol at your next house party.

Even if you don’t feel like eating the food at Leo’s these next few weeks, make your extra swipes worth it by snagging one of these goodies before they’re all gone!

Photos/Gifs: reactiongifs.com, angrytrainerfitness.com, imgur.com

Free Nutella

nutella

Between now and Feb. 17 you can tweet a picture of Nutella pancakes @Nutella using the hashtag #NutellaPancakeSweeps and you’ll be entered to win a coupon for a free jar of Nutella!

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Leo’s puts out Nutella every once in a blue moon, so whether you get the opportunity to snap a pic and devour the delicious pancakes remains to be seen.

This promotion is probably in celebration of World Nutella Day, which, for you uncultured commoners, is TODAY!

Here are a few ways to celebrate Nutella Day – which, by the way, should be celebrated everyday:

Nutella cinnamon rolls (just get the ready-made kind from Vittles and drown them in Nutella)

grid-cell-28085-1416536508-5

Banana Nutella smoothie

Nutella and peanut butter sandwich with bacon

Nutella milkshake (you can get one at the Bulldog Tavern)

Bacon covered in Nutella

nutella-bacon

Nutella and banana croissants (Pillsbury crescent roll dough with sliced banana and heaps of Nutella rolled inside)

If none of these suggestions moved you, you can always just grab a jar and a spoon. Go to the grocery store, get tweeting and enjoy World Nutella Day!

Photos: Nutella; Buzzfeed.com; firstcovers.com

Nutella Madness Returns to DC

Nutella Truck

Well, here’s the news all you Nutella lovers have been waiting for. Starting June 14, the Nutella truck has been making its sequel debut, straight from God’s heart into your arms and bellies. You might have been caught off guard by the word “sequel.” Could this magical event have possibly occurred before without your knowledge?

Never fear, because last time around, the 4E had you covered with the full scoop! This time around is the same, except even better because Nutella is celebrating its 50th anniversary! So get your dancing shoes on, warm your stomachs up and enjoy the birthday of your best friend ever.

This weekend, the truck is going to be at the Freedom Plaza (1455 Pennsylvania Avenue, NW) for something called the Safeway BBQ battle. We’re not exactly sure what this is, but it sounds amazing. The truck will be around from 11 a.m. to 4 p.m., so make sure to stop by and pick up your free samples with bread and waffles. I’m just going to give you, the reader, a few seconds to take that in. Free samples of Nutella are available this Saturday and Sunday! According to the weather forecast, the weekend won’t even be as painfully hot and gross as these past few days have been. You’re basically obligated to stop by the truck!

Follow the comings and goings of the Nutella truck, and the Nutella corporation in general, at http://nutellausa.tumblr.com/. And spread the word — everyone should get a taste of freedom (that is, a taste of Nutella at Freedom Plaza).

Special thanks to DC Dining Guide for the heads-up.

Photo: imgur.com

Move Over, Valentine’s Day: Here’s Your New Favorite February Holiday

NutellaIt’s Feb. 5 – you know what that means! No, we’re not talking about Chris Parnell’s birthday or the release of Charlie Chaplin’s first “talkie.” We talkin’ World Nutella Day.

nutella-addicted_23

For the uninitiated, “New-tella” (NEVER “Nut-ella”) is a delicious spread made with hazelnuts and cocoa. That’s right — a whole day devoted to that creamy-chocolatey goodness. But what’s an official holiday without some history?

For Nutella’s creation, we can thank the good people at the Ferrero company, also famous for those addictive Ferrero Rocher chocolates and … Tic Tacs. In the 1940s during World War II, cocoa rationing forced Pietro Ferrero to use hazelnuts instead of cocoa in his products. According to the official Nutella USA website, Nutella was originally called “pasta gianduja” and was sold in little loaves. But once it became apparent that Nutella was popular for more than sandwiches, Ferrero started selling the goodness as a more spreadable product in a jar: “supercrema gianduja.” The name Nutella came about in 1964, and the rest is history.

So how should you celebrate World Nutella Day? The only logical answer is to consume Nutella as much as possible. If you do this already, then carry on with your normal activities. Understandably, not everyone is accustomed to the old “spoon-and-jar.” Well, you’re in luck! Here at 4E we have already documented our love for Nutella. Check out the link for some quick and easy recipes. For maximum nutty appreciation, these treats are best eaten while curled up on your bed and watching Netflix. Just remember to take a break at some point — don’t be this guy. Happy Nutella-ing, Hoyas!

Photo: photoscapebrushes.blogspot.com, gifstumblr.com

The Advisory Neighborhood Commission 4E

ANC4E

The blueprint for the new on-campus dormitory recently received unanimous approval from the Advisory Neighborhood Commission 2E. Well, it’s time for it to get a fantastical re-vamping from the Advisory Neighborhood Commission 4E. WIth a little imaaaaginaaaation, what would we put in our ideal dorm?

The best of D.C. food court – We Hoyas are busy people! And as much as we’d like to travel to Adams Morgan for Amsterdam Felafel every day, it’s just not feasible. Even the walk to Wisey’s is sometimes too much for those of us who are either too swamped or too lazy. So our perfect dorm would have a food court in the basement complete with Wisey’s, Amsterdam Felafel, Mai Thai, Los Cuates, Serendipity, a mini-Uncommon Grounds, and a revival of Tuscany. All open until 4am. In the corner, of course, there’s one of these.

A Georgetown sports lounge – The entirety of the top floor would be a Hoya Blue palace. Complete with blue and grey decor, a huge flat screen TV, surround sound, a spirit body paint station, snack shack, plenty of seating, and mini-thrones for our beloved bulldogs, this lounge would be the hot spot for the viewing of any Georgetown sporting event.

A Leo’s display – In the lobby, there would be a screen displaying the different options at Leo’s that day so you can decide if there’s anything that piques your appetite. That way you know if you should head to Leo’s or go the other way to Hoya Court or Epicurean.

NextGUTS – Right below the Leo’s display, there will be a ticker letting you know when the next GUTS busses are coming so you know if you need to sprint or can take a leisurely walk to catch your plane home or go grocery shopping.

Metro – Step out of your room, walk to the elevator, press “B2” (for Basement 2), the doors open and BOOM. YOU’RE IN A METRO STATION. Does it make sense? No, but let us dream.

Built in speakers – Somewhere on your desk there will be somewhere to plug in your iPod, iPhone, or mp3 player and you can play music through the speakers built into your wall. Now all you have to do is agree on a playlist with your roommate!

Soundproof walls – Since you have built in speakers, you’ll probably want to dance around your room with a hairbrush singing TaySwift or some Beyoncé. And you probably don’t want to bother your neighbors or let them know how much you love your own tone-deaf version of the song “22”, so the walls are soundproofed for your convenience. This also makes your room a much easier place to study, leaving Lau a little less crowded during finals.

CAN I GET A HOT TUB? – Yes, you can. You can also use the same logic to get “the girl from 4E”.

Pool tables and ping pong tables in the common room – In our perfect dorm, the common rooms are large enough to accommodate some billiards and ping pong so that there’s something more to do on the weekends or another option for study breaks.

Puppy visiting hours – Puppies in the lobby every Monday. That is all.

Number lock pads – “I lost my key!” said nobody living in our perfect dorm. If we had our way, the rooms would have number lock pads that accept a 6-number code to enter the room as opposed to a key. That way you don’t have to worry about getting locked out!

GrubHub delivery chutes – How do these work? We don’t know, we’re just the creativity behind the ideas. This idea would mean that everyone has a small dumbwaiter-looking box in their room. When you order food for delivery or from GrubHub, the delivery person puts your food in the corresponding dumbwaiter in the lobby, types in your room number, and then you would send the money down or pay by card before your order. That way you can get food for delivery without ever having to leave your room. Laziness at its finest! Is this feasible? No. Is it still amazing? Yes.

The Hoya – The Hoya delivered magically to your door every Tuesday and Friday. What more could you ask for?

What would you like to see in your new dorm? Toss us some suggestions in the comments!

Life, Love and the Pursuit of Nutella: Round 2

Nutella-Cheesecake-RowLadies and Gentlemen: This is it. I repeat, this is it.

In the wise words of LMFAO, “Let’s Go Round 2.” No, I do not mean Round 2 of a delicious alcoholic beverage. No I don’t mean Round 2 of the NCAA Tournament (FGCU still haunts my memories). No, I don’t mean Round 2, as in the Stylistics album released in October 1973.

I’m talking about the big time.

The whole shebang.

The never-before-seen sequel to Round One. What you’re about to witness is going to change your life even more than Marriage Equality (which you should all support).

This is Life, Love and the Pursuit of Nutella: Round 2.

In case you weren’t up to par with all the delicious things you can do with our favorite chocolatey-hazelnut spread, here are a few succulent and delicious ways that you can change your life with Nutella:

Toasted Nutella and Cream Cheese- Three simple ingredients: Nutella, cream cheese, bread. Toast the bread. Add the cream cheese and Nutella to each slice. Place in oven. Broil for a minute or two. Place creation in your mouth. Want to know what happens next? Ecstasy.

No Bake Nutella Cheesecake- I searched far and wide for a recipe that combined possibly the two greatest things in the world: Nutella and Cheesecake. Then, I narrowed down searches to only include the ingredients owned by and culinary skill level of a lazy college student. This was the result. It’s like the Mona Lisa of cheesecake. Call me a Renaissance man.

Nutella Brownies Did I ever mention Nutella Mona Lisa had a twin sister? Well, here she is. Her name is Sally, and all Sally needs are eggs, Nutella and flour. Want to know how R. Kelly reacted after he ate these brownies? Like this. (Editor’s note: THEY ALSO HAVE THESE AT BAKED AND WIRED AND THEY’RE BEAUTIFUL)

No Bake Nutella Peanut Butter Cookies- First of all, this recipe makes 24 cookies, which is almost the amount that I would eat when I’m all by myself. Second of all, it requires absolutely no baking. In fact it only requires the skill of this child and it produces results that will give you goosebumps. Kind of like the ones I get when I listen to Whitney Houston sing the Star Spangled Banner.

Waffles and Nutella- Step One: Go to Leo’s with a jar of Nutella. It’s only weird if you make it weird. Step Two: Add batter to the waffle machine as if you were making a normal waffle. Step Three: Add dollops of Nutella into the batter. Game changer. If you’re ready for the Big Leagues, add Nutella and ice cream on top of your Nutella Waffle. That’s right, bow down.

Nutella Banana Smoothie- 1 cup vanilla yogurt. 1/3 cup Nutella. (But seriously, add more if you want.) 1 banana. 1 cup ice. Blend and be amazed.

This Words just can’t even explain… I’m… I’m… crying tears of joy.

Until next time, you Nutella-loving Hoyas.

Photo: My Baking Addiction