Halloween Costumes for Hoyas From Every School

Fellow Hoyas, prepare yourselves. Spooky szn is descending upon us — and no, I’m not referring to the sudden ubiquity of dead rodents on campus.

That’s right: It’s almost Halloween, and if you’re not interested in frantically scouring the clearance bins of every store on M Street the day before ~Halloweekend~ begins, it’s time to start thinking. Luckily, you have us lovely folks at 4E here to guide you in picking the right costume to impress that cutie from “Problem of God.”

1. For the MSBro:

You’ve been wearing stiff suits every day, Birding from your dorm to the MSB to recruitment events and investment banking job interviews like a maniac. It’s time to let loose, Brad! Shed that Brooks Brothers jacket, kick off your Gucci loafers and go a little crazy. Hugh Hefner is the perfect costume for you this Halloween — comfortable and relaxed, but still on brand.

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This could be you, Chad!

What you’ll need for this costume: A silk robe and preferably some gray hair spray. The pipe optional, but respect that Hugh would never Juul.

2. For the NHS-er:

THIS IS YOUR TIME TO SHINE, NHS. You have the one thing no other school at Georgetown has: scrubs. Go as your favorite “Grey’s Anatomy” character — AKA literally anyone but Izzie — and carry around some lollipops for bonus points. Just be careful not to be too convincing in your costume, or you’ll become the de facto GERMS dispatcher of the night, holding back your friends’ hair near the bushes of Henle Village.

You, breaking it down at the Henle in total and complete comfort as all your friends complain about their costumes being uncomfortable.
When your friend slips on some soda and thinks they broke their ankle, you can put those freshman bio class #skillz to use and tell them to rally!

What you’ll need: scrubs, maybe some lollipops and your charming self.

3. For the SFS-er:

You need the world to know both that you’re in the SFS and that you are ~politically conscious.~ You don’t just get CNN notifications on your phone — you listen to podcasts and read think-pieces as you run from “Map of the Modern World” to “I-Trade” (both of which are SFS core requirements, which the SFS has a lot of, which you have to take because you’re…in the SFS). That’s why for Halloween you should go as the anonymous New York Times Trump op-ed! Intelligence and worldliness with a little bit of ~mystery~ is what you’re all about, and this is the perfect costume to show the world what ya got — and leave them wanting more.

That's REALLY reaching! Online retailer Yandy is selling a 'sexy anonymous op-ed' costume

What you’ll need: This costume exactly (and for people to know you’re in the SFS. That’s the Edmund A. Walsh School of Foreign Service, or SFS for short).

4. The College Kid:

While all your friends in other schools at Georgetown talk about their focus and their requirements and how their school is ~different,~ you have opted for a liberal arts education and greater breadth of majors/paths of study. You can’t be put in a box. Some might even say you … Can’t Be Tamed.

To capture the true variety of the College, grab a few pals from the largest of the undergraduate schools here on the Hilltop, and go as Miley Cyrus through the ages. The theater kid can embrace Miley’s performative versatility and go as Hannah Montana, while your JUPS major friend can be this new hippie Miley who meditates and enjoys her ~greens.~ There’s something for everyone!

What you’ll need: A few friends, some bleach to dye your hair and a readiness to stick your tongue out in every picture.

With these suggestions in mind, go forth and conquer those pre-Halloween costume-picking scaries! And if you’re really pressed and need a scary costume ASAP, write “70k” on a shirt and go as the scariest thing of them all: our tuition. Happy Hoya-ween!

Sources: giphy.com, esquire.com, dailymail.co.uk, savers.com

Miley Mayhem and “Can’t Stop” Controversy

Miley

Miley Cyrus isn’t one to stray away from polemics. Over the course of her short career, Miley has caused more than one mouth to drop with her wild partying and rebellious antics. Most recently, she’s been spotted twerking with Juicy J and hanging out with Justin Bieber and his leopard print Audi. And just to top things off, Miley’s released a shocking new single – and let me just say, “We Can’t Stop” definitively lives up to her recent Disney-sweetheart-turned-bad-girl reputation.

From the first few seconds of Miley’s new tune, it’s clear that Miley isn’t looking to revert to her more innocent days. The song begins with a voice-distorted, in-your-face, YOLO-generation statement: “It’s our party/ we can do what we want… we can say what we want… we can kiss who we want.”

As the song progresses, Miley makes it obvious that for her and her generation, nothing is going to change. “We can’t stop/ And we won’t stop,” she sings, referring to the over-the-top party lifestyle of her millennial age group. But it’s not the lyrics about partying that are causing “We Can’t Stop” to garner such a mixed response from listeners. (After all, we already know that Miley “Can’t Be Tamed.”) Rather, it’s the salvia-smoking singer’s drug references that are creating quite the sharp reaction to her newest single.

Ms. Cyrus isn’t afraid at all to bring drugs into wild nights of which she sings. “La dee dee da dee/ Dancing with molly,” she croons, followed later by, “Everyone in line in the bathroom/ Trying to get a line in the bathroom.”

First MDMA and then cocaine? I didn’t see that one coming, Miley. Heck, even Kendrick Lamar is a bit shocked.

What do you think of Miley’s drug references? Think that it’s “her mouth and she can say what she wants to?” Or do you want it all to stop? Take a listen to the new single below and give us a holler in the comments!

Photo: Google+