Welcome Back!

The trees on Prospect Street are starting to change color. The NSO horde has descended upon campus, tasked with welcoming over a thousand new students. Jack the Bulldog is on his way home from a restful summer vacation in Turks & Caicos.

In other words, the start of a new school year is here.

View into a typical apartment/dorm room the night before classes start.

We’ve been away for a while, so 4E has placed several investigative journalists on the scene to inform you, our readers, about the current state of life at Georgetown.

1.  Late Night Leo’s is back. This reporter got eyes on a top-secret Dining Committee meeting in which, praise be, it was confirmed that Leo’s will be both extending its evening hours AND its daily breakfast hours. Things are really looking up. How to take advantage of this upgrade: take your significant other on a romantic date in the sensual ambiance of post-9pm O’Donovan’s on the Waterfront.

You back on your “Eat, Pray, Leo’s” bulls***.

2. Senseless construction projects continue to reign supreme. This reporter has gathered several receipts on the noisy, bothersome operations that disrupt the usually mediocre idyllic standard of life at Georgetown. From the Hospital Pavilion to the perplexing gated area in front of Regents, prepare yourselves for a year of getting woken up early by drill sounds.

“A Quiet Place” but the monsters are construction workers disturbing your drunken slumber.

3. Coming Soon: Big Mouth Season 2. 4E’s favorite Hoyalumni, John Mulaney and Nick Kroll, have been killing it with their stand-up specials, Broadway shows and overall hilariousness. The former GU Improv duo made puberty the ~butt~ of many jokes with Netflix’s Big Mouth. Lucky for us, more is supposedly coming our way this fall. Be sure to binge watch instead of studying for midterms. Its what John and Nick would have wanted.

Freshmen using their fakes at Opera for the first time.

4. Rats. They’re everywhere. Returning students are generally desensitized to the presence of rodents on campus, but it feels like they’ve come back with a vengeance this year. This reporter was personally victimized by several SCREECHING critters on the way back from LXR last night. Just throwing it out there—there’s no shame in taking a SafeRide from ICC to Vil A to avoid them.

Walking out of Lau at 2 am like…

5. LIL DICKY is coming to town. Not ~technically~ a Georgetown-specific event, but if you haven’t bought tickets yet for his November 6th show, GET THEM NOW. I’m totally not writing this so I can DM him and tell him that I personally sold tickets on his behalf, causing him to fall in love and have beautiful Jewish babies with me.

 

Honorary AEPi member

6. Kirstjen Nielsen. While most of us were topping off our tans and drinking vodka lemonades, this Georgetown grad spent her summer separating families and interning children in “tender-age facilities.” I can’t *smh* enough about the work of Kirstjen and her fellow #guilty alum, Mr. Paul Manafort.

What is tax fraud anyway, though?

7. Midterms! I’m not talking about the ones that give you a temporary ulcer and make you question the purpose of higher education. DC is about to be torn apart in a storm of political divisiveness, so hurry up and get yourselves Hillternships ASAP so you can watch it happen. Caveat emptor: you have to actually vote in order to participate.

Oprah for the House, Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson for the Senate.

8. You’re still playing yourself. Georgetown may be one of the top schools in the country, but even great intellect can’t stop smart people from doing stupid things. Locking yourself out of your room for the third time in three days really makes you question the teachers who told you to dream big back in high school. Here’s to a year full of dumb mistakes…

You can always drink away the embarrassment.

Best of luck everyone! Hoya Saxa.

 

Sources: giphy.com, theanthemdc.com,

Just a Hoya and her Bonna-crew

hoyadoesbonnarooLast weekend, a group of friends and I road tripped to Manchester, Tennessee, a small town of about 10,000 people, which, for four days every June, swells to a population ten times that as people from around the country flood the town for the annual music and arts festival, Bonnaroo. It is a difficult setting to describe. When I told people that I was going to spend four days in the Tennessee heat, sleeping in a tent with no toilet and $7 showers, they scoffed at me more often than not. Yet as nightmarish as it sounds (and at some points it was just that – let’s just say I never want to see a port-a-potty ever again), my time was also filled with remarkable and warm strangers, exceptional music, unforgettable performances and even better friends.

When my Bonna-crew and I arrived on Wednesday afternoon, we were directed to our camping spot by volunteers, and I felt a little like I was back at NSO, being shepherded by smiling and dancing volunteers, who cheered at me while I attempted to navigate the new world I had just entered. The 700-acre farm on which Bonnaroo is held was a veritable maze of tents, vendors and stages. Of course stage names such as “What Stage” and “Which Stage” didn’t help as I tried to coordinate with my friends at “This Tent” and not “That Tent” or “the Other Tent.”

Nonetheless, everyone was plainly excited to be there, and that energy never seemed to subside. Everywhere we went I was greeted with “Happy Bonnaroo” and a high five. I swear I have never given more high fives in one weekend since I was seven and still playing soccer. Tom Brady should come to Bonnaroo next year and I promise even he won’t be left hanging.

WelltodoContentHorseshoecrab

In between shows, we scavenged for shade to sit and watch the throngs of people. The weekend included Friday the 13th and there were costumes abound, and Bonnaroovians certainly did not forget their national pride on Flag Day (although whether everyone was aware that it was Flag Day I’m not too sure). We also got to know our neighbors in the campgrounds, who included a expert group attending Bonnaroo for the fifth year and whose camping space would befit Khaleesi herself. On our other side was a dude who lived with his parents and saved up his money every year in order to show off his skill with those LED fingertip gloves at music festivals (I’m not kidding). I even ran into some Syracuse fans who recognized my Georgetown shirt and had some choice words concerning our upcoming 2015-2016 encounter. I responded appropriately.

With five stages playing from around noon to 4 a.m., it was impossible to see everything that I would have liked to. However, some of my personal highlights included:

  • Dr. Dog An eclectic group of just genuinely talented musicians, check them out.
  • Disclosure If you haven’t already, go listen to their album Settle beginning to end.
  • Vampire Weekend Two words – Ezra. Koenig.
  • Flaming Lips There were huge dancing rainbows and mushrooms… ’nuff said.
  • Arctic Monkeys Currently one of my favorite bands and I was only three rows away from the front!
  • And of course the one-and-only Elton John He closed the festival on Sunday night and played for a full two hours, yet somehow he seemed to never run out of classic songs.

gif: giant.gfycat.com/WelltodoContentHorseshoecrab.gif

This post brought to you by Katarina Malmgren, a rising sophomore in the College, our latest guest blogger, and NOLA’s resident cool kid.