An Ode to Finals Season

As the long-awaited Dec. 20 draws near, we here at 4E have prepared an ode to undoubtedly the merriest time of the year: FINALS SZN. Whether you’re reading this post in the sanctity of your own dearly missed home, at your ~unique~ vacation spot in Mexico or on the Hilltop waiting for your unfortunately-scheduled math final, we can relate to what you’re feeling:

So, without further ado, let’s all take a moment to reflect on Georgetown’s beloved stress culture, appreciate the ~high-quality~ Whisk coffee that has fueled us thus far and give ourselves a pat on the back for succeeding  doing relatively well surviving this semester!

After endless midterms, weeks of studying all night,

there’s a brief respite, then finals are in sight.

It seems like it’s always time to buckle down

but that’s just part of being at Georgetown

The struggle is real as you prep for Bib Lit —

but what can you expect from the Jesuits?

You’ve got 99 problems, the first is Of God,

and in time you’re exposed as a Catholic fraud.

In your first exam, those wretched blue books appear

and before too long, they’re stained with your tears.

You fight through hand cramps for two hours straight,

and from nine to eleven, your heart palpitates.

Lau 2 is love, Lau 2 is life —

just kidding, that place is a hellhole of strife.

You wonder, will these troubles ever be over?

It’s been awhile since you’ve been this sober.

You’ve studied forever, it seems like a time warp,

and while waiting at MUG, you curse the capitalist Corp.

Later that day, you procrastinate more:

It was feeling too lonely up on Lau 4.

You’re buried in books on a Saturday night —

to friends at state schools, it’s a pitiful sight.

It’s only midnight, but the future looks bleak.

You remind yourself, though, that sleep’s for the weak.

But when you finally get into the swing of things,

to no one’s surprise, Lau’s fire alarm rings.

So you make your way over to good ol’ Leavey —

should four flights of stairs really make you this wheezy?

Texts from your friends say they’re already on break,

but at least they’ll be free to attend your wake.

You’re struggling to find the will to survive,

indeed, you fall short of the expectation to thrive.

“How to learn French in a day,” you search online.

You’d forgotten “Bonjour”— probably not a good sign

After handing in your final subpar paper,

it looks like life’s finally turned in your favor.

Though GPA-wise, there may be reason to fear,

that’ll be a problem you save for next year.

The holidays will provide plenty of reason

for you to repress this finals season.

Walking past Healy, you take a pic and proceed,

“until next semester!” your Snapchat story reads.

Suitcase in hand, you feel an upswing in mood

at the thought of three weeks without Leo’s food.

You search for your Uber outside the front gates —

What’s taking so long? New Jersey awaits!

~Happy Hoyadays~ from all of us at 4E!


The 5 Stages of Winter Break

1. Relief

You’re Finally Done. Thank God. You made it through an entire semester of Bib Lit without ever actually opening a bible. You recognized more than a generous 50%  of the words on your Spanish exam. Was your final CPS essay good? Not really, but you met the word count, submitted it on time, and most importantly, you’ll never have to talk to your unreliable graduate-student TA ever again! So say goodbye to that Lau cubicle, shove some random clothes and your Juul charger into a duffel bag, and call an Uber to Union Station: it’s officially ~break~.

You, waving goodbye to the poor souls who still have to take a Sociology final

2.  Relaxation

Showering without flip-flops in a bathroom without black mold? Eating a meal that doesn’t involve ramen noodles or flamin’ hot cheetos? Stepping outside and not being greeted by at least a dozen large rats? They should call you King Felipe VI of Spain (G ’95), ‘cause this Hoya is living like royalty. You never knew you would miss suburbia this much. No imminent deadlines, stolen  borrowed quizlets, or panic attacks induced by SaxaNet. You have all the time in the world to lounge around the house, send snapchats of your dog, and debate whether or not it’s still ok to binge watch House of Cards (Editor’s note: It’s not. Stick to Friends. David Schwimmer is our last hope).

Not proofreading that final BlackBoard submission like

3. Remembrance

You meet up with your high school squad at the local Applebee’s and reminisce about Gonzaga   Delbarton your totally unique alma mater. At the wise old age of 20, you fondly look back at the shenanigans of your youth. Remember when you prank called your Calculus teacher? Remember when you stole a beer from your dad’s fridge in the basement? Remember when you said you had “senioritis” but actually continued to try very hard in school because you wanted to go to Georgetown? Haha! Good Times! You weren’t lame at all!

The AP Bio reunion is finna be ~lit~

4. Regret

Ok, it’s been a week and you’ve realized why you were so eager to leave home in the first place. There are no Ubers or places that stay open past 10 pm here. Your parents have an incessant need know where you’re going, who you’re going with, and “is there going to be alcohol there?”. And when you do go out, you have to constantly remind people that you go to Georgetown, not GW and then pretentiously explain why THEY ARE VERY DIFFERENT SCHOOLS. You miss procrastinating on Lau 2 with your friends. You miss saying hi to The Wisey’s Rat. You even find yourself missing New Leo’s (not really, but we’ll pretend for the sake of this article). It’s officially time to go back to the Hilltop.

“You go to GW, right?”

5. Return

You tear up as you see Healy from across the Key Bridge. It’s been too long since last you met. You bask in the glow of a new semester, telling yourself that this is the year you finally get it together. No more going out on Tuesday nights or skipping every class that meets before 2 pm. No more eating Wisey’s cookies for dinner or convincing yourself that walking up Lau steps counts as a workout. Yes, you’ll abandon this attitude completely within the next two weeks, but it’s nice to enjoy the “new and improved 2018 you!” while it lasts. You’re reunited with your squad, you’re wearing the one cool piece of clothing you got for Christmas, and you’re ready for Syllabus Week. Hoya Saxa, it’s good to be home.

You, at Chi Di, two hours after you claimed you were going to start counting your drinks this year, ca 2018, colorized.


Six Types of Relatives You’ll Meet at Thanksgiving: Hoya Edition

As the holiday season draws near, Hoyas are gladly anticipating a break from their usual Leo’s meals—but at what cost? Here’s 4E’s rundown of the six types of relatives that we all just ~can’t wait~ to reunite with over this Thanksgiving dinner…

1. The Interrogative Relationship Guru

“Do you have a boyfriend? That’s too bad! What about the cute boy in your Instagram post?”

First of all, Grandma, he’s gay. Undeterred, she offers up her very best date ideas from “back in the day” as you stifle your laughter at the thought of any MSBro at a drive-in theater. You wonder if the sort of “fine young men” she continually references even exist on the Hilltop.

2. The Millennial Wannabe

Lucky for you, this aunt’s midlife crisis seems to have perfectly aligned with your annual encounter. Having seen your Snapchat story from last Friday, she proposes a “girls’ night out” at Chi Di next weekend. You promptly delete your social media and apply to study abroad.

3. The Deadbeat

Maybe your college life isn’t as wholesome as your grandparents may think, but unlike this cousin, at least you’ll definitely most likely end up with a diploma. You decide that introducing him to your SFS friends might set his life back on track but quickly think better of it. Having him around will make you feel better about yourself when next semester’s club rejection season rolls around.

4. The Diehard Trump Supporter

Tattooed with the U.S. flag and shamelessly sporting a MAGA hat, this uncle finds a way to blame everything on the immigrants—even this year’s burnt turkey. You politely bear the brunt of his incessant rant until he spots the GU College Dems and H*yas For Choice stickers on your laptop, after which he avoids all interaction with you for the rest of the night. Success.

5. The Shy Guy

Exchanging forced pleasantries with this relative is even more uncomfortable than leading a tour group on Georgetown Day. As awkward as the conversation is, though, it’s just like the ICC: you can’t find a way out.

6. The Annual Alcoholic

This relative looks as tipsy as the Wisey’s rat before the turkey’s even carved. She must have mistaken Thanksgiving dinner for a late-night Epi gathering, but at least by tomorrow she’ll forget the night ever happened, and you can equally pretend that it never did.

We at 4E bestow our deepest sympathy and respect upon any Hoya that successful endures a conversation with three or more of these ~special~ relatives. On a serious note, we hope you all enjoy your well-deserved break from school and express thanks for all the family members who’ve supported you from afar (even those who fall under one of these categories)!


Manly Monday: Spring Break Edition


While the weather in DC wouldn’t be any indication, Spring Break is just a week away. One more week of classes and we can all retreat to warm paradises or our cozy homes. After a brutal few weeks of midterms and papers, a much-deserved break is finally on the horizon. The men at 4E are here to make sure our loyal manly men are all prepped for Spring Break.

funny animated GIF


This winter in DC has been historically cold, so it has definitely been a while since anyone has had the ability to break out the shorts and T-shirts. A solid wardrobe is essential to a memorable spring break. You don’t want to be that guy wearing the generic Nike shirt and shorts combo.

Every manly man needs something memorable, their own personal schtick. Maybe your thing will be visors instead of traditional hats, short-shorts or an assortment of old jerseys. Either way, you need to find something unique and embrace it.

If you’re just looking to upgrade, Chubbies Shorts are always a classic favorite. Also, everyone appreciates a good Hawaiian shirt, so make sure to have at least one in your repertoire. Finally, don’t forget a swimsuit. Seems so obvious, but unique trunks can really pull together a Spring Break outfit.


A quality and extensive Spring Break playlist is essential. You are finally back out in the sun and able to appreciate music that doesn’t make you long for the days of summer.

Spring break is a time for often-forgot-about “summer” songs to make their way back to your Spotify playlists. So break out that summer playlist that has been underutilized since the long-ago days of warmth.

Don’t have one? Don’t worry. 4E has you covered with a variety of summer and spring break themed playlists. Here is our latest Summer Throwbacks playlist that should definitely be utilized during your Spring Break.

Some country stars like Luke Bryan even have whole albums dedicated to Spring Break. So next time you need a study break, throw together a playlist for you and your boys to enjoy while getting a nice tan.

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The Perfect Tan

That leads me to the next thing you need to prep for: getting that perfect bronze tan. Getting a quality tan is an artform. Burn too early, and you ruin your whole trip. Be too safe, you become one of those people that gets on a plane leaving Florida, Mexico, etc. still pasty white. It is a fine line you need to walk, but we are here to help.

First off, know your problem spots. For most people shoulders and nose are classic problem areas, so pay close attention to them. I recommend always putting a higher strength SPF on them. Obviously you are going to want to start out with stronger sunscreen, then work your way down.

After a long day in the sun, your best friend is going to be aloe. Even if you didn’t burn that day, it will help your skin recover for the next day.

Make sure to have an even tan. Nothing looks more bizarre than someone who laid on their back all day and their front is blatantly darker than their back.

Also, don’t wear sunglasses too often. A tan line from those is glaring and embarrassing. Moral of the story: be careful and don’t be embarrassed to ask a friend to help you reach those spots that you just cannot get to.

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What to Do?

While the majority of Spring Break should be spent relaxing, obviously you are all there to have fun. An instant way to ruin fun is to end up bickering at each other about what to do. Make sure to have some things planned.

In Florida for the week? Catch a Spring Training baseball game which just got started. Maybe you can all each pick one thing to do on the trip to make sure everyone gets to do what they want and no one has to argue. However you choose to do it, go into the vacation with a bit of a plan, but remember that you are there to kick back and relax.

Staying Home?

There is absolutely nothing wrong with heading home for Spring Break. Maybe you are lucky enough to live in a classic Spring Break area, and your backyard is your vacation. If you are home, it is important that you still enjoy yourself and not sulk around that you aren’t somewhere else.

Home is often the main ingredient in a recipe for a relaxing and fulfilling break. Spend time with your family, eat your favorite meals, finish House of Cards, or whatever suits you. The fact that you had to go home should not mean you have a boring break. Sometimes your couch and family are better than thousands of other people crowded onto a small beach. Everyone misses their family, so cherish the time you have at home.

Spring Break will be a welcome break that everyone has been counting down towards since we came back from winter break. No matter where you are going, or with who, just make sure to kick back, relax, and enjoy the break. To all the loyal followers of Manly Mondays, have a man-tastic Spring Break.

relax animated GIF


“So, How Was Your Break?”

AwkwardIf you’re anything like me, you’ve probably had about 13 conversations today that have gone like this. It begins with an awkward hug, and then:

Person 1: Hey! How was your break?
Person 2: Good! How was yours?
Person 1: Good!
[Conversation ends even more awkwardly than the hug.]

4E doesn’t like awkward post-winter-break conversations. That’s why we’ve made this handy dandy list of alternative conversation starters for you to use instead of “How was your break?”

1. What was your favorite part about your break?

2. What are you looking forward to most about this semester?

3. Did you make any good New Year’s resolutions?

4. How about that Auburn-FSU game?

5. If you were a Harry Potter character, who would you be and why? (Not break-related, but always important to know.)

6. What did you give your family for Christmas?

7. [Insert political topic.] Suggestions include the Chris Christie email scandal, marijuana legalization in Colorado and/or Obamacare. Be wary, though. These might get heated.

8. Have you applied to The Fourth Edition yet? Because you really should.

9. Do you like green eggs and ham? Why or why not?

10. What’s your favorite/least favorite part of the first day of classes?

And if all else fails…

11. How about this weather?


How It Feels to Start Classes Again

First Day of SchoolBy now most, if not all, of you are done with the Christmas cookies and never-ending family time. The holidays were fun, but now it’s back to the Hilltop we love and the schoolwork we hate. It goes a little like this:

You get back to Georgetown, so excited to see your friends…


… even though it’s been only 3 weeks. (But it seems like a lifetime and a half.)

Everything is fab, until you realize you actually have to take classes.

tumblr_mg3jorsMT21qh402go1_250Like any good Georgetown student, you spend an unimaginable amount of time picking out that perfect “back-to-school” outfit, which seems to not exist.


Finally, you find “the one” and you feel like a million bucks (or like a 4.0 GPA).


But Wednesday morning is not too friendly.


And there is always that one person who is way too excited.


Your teachers actually expect you to learn.


But your mind is blank. Or possibly still frozen from the cold.


The bookstore is a total mess.


And then you see someone in the library already. GOOD. FOR. YOU.


You realize that Leo’s is once again your main food option and all happiness disappears.


But being back with Jack the Bulldog makes everything much better.


And despite the teachers, classes and long lines at the RHO, at least you are back on the Hilltop. Now you will have about a week or so until you are actually allowed to be stressed again. So enjoy the time off, Hoyas … we are all going to need it!

GIFS:, Photo:

10 Things You Were Glad You Did Before Going Back to School

Winter breakNow that most of us are back on the Hilltop (sorry to those of you who are getting trolled by the weather), let’s reflect on the things that we were really glad we did on the last day before we returned.

1. Stayed in bed until 2 p.m.

Sleeping Beauty knows what’s up.

2. Wore pajamas the entire day.

Just another thing James Franco and I have in common.

3. Didn’t shower.

Like there was anybody to impress anyway.

4. Ate breakfast for dinner, or anything for dinner, or breakfast for anything.

Breakfast Club gets us.

5. Mindlessly watched Netflix for HOURS.

“Am I doing anything on my last day home? NO!”

6. Ate your last home-cooked meal.

Now just savor the taste of that meal to keep you sane through the weeks until Spring Break.

7. Got spoiled by your parents.

Maybe they aren’t Beyoncé, but they still love you and give you things.

8. Finally showered…

The stink got too real.

9. Stayed indoors the entire day and didn’t get judged.

You and all the friends you’ll ever need.

10. Worried about absolutely nothing.

Sounds about right. I hope you had a good last day of vacation. Welcome back to the Hilltop, Hoyas!

GIFS: tumblr,

Home Sweet Home: A Personal Reflection

Home Sweet HomeGoing home is a funny thing, and it feels different for everyone. It feels different every time you go home, and the feeling can even change while you are home. So while I sit here, hanging out with my senior citizen of a dog watching Home Alone, I’ll try to capture that feeling as best I can.

I guess it all starts with the celebratory relief of finishing finals. After putting our bodies and minds through two weeks of varying levels of sleep, stress and studying, getting home simply means being able to relax. There is essentially nothing important to think about for two and a half weeks. It’s awesome.

Of course, next is the terrific feeling of actually getting home. For me, that’s taking my first steps on the frozen Rhode Island tundra, taking my first sip of a Dunkin iced coffee (yes, iced) and – most importantly – the warm embrace of my family. I’d be perfectly content sitting around all break, spending my time off just chatting and catching up. If there’s one thing I miss most while away at school, it’s seeing my family every day.

But, of course, after escaping the countless hugs of your family, it’s time to see your friends. No matter how many new friends I make at school, there is still something about spending quality time with the people I grew up with that will never get old. Whether we’re reminiscing about old memories or making new ones, there is rarely a dull moment when we all get back together.

Every break, though, I really miss Georgetown. I miss the sights, sounds and most of all, the people. As great as my family and old friends are, it is always a bit bittersweet to return home.

What stands out to me the most at home are the little things, the things that I just didn’t appreciate as much as I should have before I left for school: the feeling of my bed, the smell of the air and the taste of my mom’s glorious cooking. The sense of everything and everyone coming together to celebrate. The most consistent, defining feeling of being home is appreciation.

Over the coming weeks, take the time to appreciate. While I don’t think there is anything wrong with feeling ready to head back to the Hilltop at the end of break, be sure to enjoy the little things (and the big ones, too) while you are home.

Happy holidays, Hoyas!

How It Felt To Go Home for Winter Break

Home-for-the-Holidays-ColoradoCongratulations, Hoyas, you made it through finals. If you are anything like us at 4E, you’re probably already sitting on your couch and binging on Netflix with a plate of food the size of a dwarf planet. Needless to say, it feels great to be home. But just in case you needed reminding how awesome it really is leave for winter break, we retold your homebound journey for you. It went something like this:

When you finished your last final, you questioned if everything was real life. Could you actually be done?


In a brain-fried daze, you slowly walked back into your room and opened the door. Then you did this:

But you suddenly realized your train/plane was leaving in an hour and you hadn’t packed anything.tumblr_lv98xhjZEx1r6aoq4o1_500

So you shoved everything humanly possible into your suitcase and ran out the door.tumblr_m7ujvlcv1X1rcp7w8o1_500

And – thank goodness – you made it to the airport/train station. [Insert sigh of relief.]


Your travelling came and went. Before you knew it, you saw your house. And then it hit you: YOU WERE HOME!


And then you walked inside your house and everything just felt so good.


And then you saw your fridge filled with food!


After that, you realized you had an infinite amount of free time with no homework to do …


… except listen to Beyoncé’s new album. Over. And. Over. Again.beyonce-1

But wait! You just realized Christmas is coming!excited-1

And, finally, the most amazingly breathtaking thing of all happened: YOU SAW YOUR BED.


So for the next 14 hours, you looked like this.


Yeah, that’s basically how it all went down. Enjoy your time off and happy holidays from 4E!

GIFS: tumblr; Photo: