DSR Defected: How to Cope

DSR

As you probably know, star basketball player D’Vauntes Smith-Rivera has put his name in to the NBA draft with an agent, forfeiting his senior year NCAA eligibility. While most bloggers speculate that he will play in Europe next year, Hoya faithful are both happy for him and heartbroken over his departure. Here are a few ways to cope with your grief.

Delete your profile pictures with him
That selfie you took from your seat in Section 403 at the Villanova game with the jumbotron in the background? Yeah, it counts.

Dye your hair back to its original color
That orange Mohawk means nothing anymore.

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Miss key assignments at the end of the semester
No love = no reason to continue studying.

Throw out his mixtape.
Yeah he spun some sick beats. So what? You don’t need the constant reminder of how he rocked that gold chain.

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Remove his phone number from your contacts so you don’t text him
You should probably unfollow him on Twitter, too.

Find a new player with a fun nickname
Some suggestions? Tre Campbell = Tre bae bae. Issac Copeland = Ike. Use your imagination.

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Avoid the places where you spent such sweet time with him
Verizon Center is officially off-limits.

Turn your tattoo of him into a lion
Your right bicep doesn’t have to be tainted forever.

Even if you take all of these preventative measures, we know the loss is going to be tough. Remember that we have a strong group of rising sophomores returning to the team and a decent recruiting class for next year. Until then, good luck DSR. We’ll really *sniff* miss you.

Photos: Instagram, Twitter.com (@CasualHoya), lion-tattoo.com, bannersontheparkway.com

Sara Carioscia

Sara Carioscia

Sara is a senior majoring in Classics and Biology. Right now she's probably eating ice cream, competing in a triathlon or annoying her roommates. Her favorite foods are Pho and M&Ms. One time she made Jason Bateman laugh.
Sara Carioscia

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