Do you like numbers and money? Are you currently scouting internships with Goldman Sachs and McKinsey? Did you spend the last week stressing out about demand curves, trade policies or externalities? If so, apparently you’re also quite sexually active! Congrats! And where do you find the time?
According to studentbeans.com’s University Sex League, econ majors have more sex partners in college than any other major. A study released last week shows that finance nerds get wacky in the sacky the most with an average of 4.88 sexual partners since starting university.
Following close behind with an average of 4.7 sexual partners are social work, community care, and counseling majors. (How does that work? Give people advice and then unbutton their pants?) With an average of 4.57 sexual partners are marketing majors. This makes more sense: what better way to learn marketing than promoting your body?
And hospitality majors with 4.56 sexual partners seem to be lagging a bit in fourth place. They have hotel rooms at their disposal — frankly, they should be doing more.
With a disappointing 1.71 sexual partners are environmental science majors in last place — below even math majors and prospective engineers. I’m hoping that reducing the size of our carbon footprint is inhibiting their dopamine receptors (not sure what other excuse they have for being prude).
What I think we can take from these results is that even the highest major averages a relatively small number of sexual partners. What’s up with college student these days? Are these not supposed to be the years of experimentation and poor judgment? Soon we will all be tied down and must conform to the norm of monogamy. But now is the time to let loose. Eh, maybe once midterms are over.