Here at 4E, we love new technology and take pride in showing you the latest and greatest in apps and social media trends. We told you about Facebook Paper. We showed you how to heat things up with Tinder. We revealed our inner intellectual with QuizUp. Now, we’re about to review the newest and bro-iest app around: BroApp. We know. Creative name, right?
Do you need to get rid of a girl fast? Never fear, BroApp is here. This app, while advertised as an easy way to balance your relationship and “bro” time, might not be as helpful as it seems…
Hate texting your girlfriend at 7 a.m.? Just set a timer on your BroApp to send automatic morning messages. You don’t need to get up early to text her; instead, you can sleep in without her even knowing. Your text wouldn’t wake her up when she’s sleeping in or anything…
Does your girl get mad when you don’t respond to her when you’re pumping iron at the gym? BroApp has an answer for that, too, with its message settings. It’s just too difficult to text her afterwards and expect her to understand the need to go to the gym.
Have no idea what to text your girlfriend anyway? Just choose from BroApp’s list of generic messages to send her! All girlfriends love a heart-felt, app-generated text. Swoon.
Are you worried your girlfriend will find out about your app use and don’t want to lie to her about it? Don’t worry, BroApp will lie to her for you! It makes sure to detect when you’re with your girlfriend so it doesn’t text when you’re together. It also has a “safety lock down” feature to prevent your suspicious girlfriend from finding the app! They do say ignorance is bliss…
So if you need more time with your bros, start using the new Australian-designed BroApp to better manage your girlfriend with minimal effort. She might even dump you, and then you’ll have all the time in the world to hang out with just the guys.
The bottom line is: If you really want this app, you need to rethink your priorities. You probably don’t even lift anyway.
For your own comic entertainment, you should check out BroApp’s promotional video on the website here. Oh, and don’t be too offended ladies, it hasn’t gone viral… yet.