Hi honey! How’s school going? Do you have a major yet? What are you planning on doing with the rest of your life? What about this summer? Tell me a lot of very personal things about your personal life! Shall we discuss our conflicting political opinions in an emotionally-charged conversation while the turkey, ham or whatever else you have for holiday feasts cooks?
You love your fam and you love the holidays, but sometimes catching up with outspoken and unabashed Great-Aunt Martha leads to questions and conversations that you could do without. More importantly, time spent answering uncomfortable questions is time not spent eating the cornbread that your uncle only makes once a year.
Here are some tips from 4E about how to respond to the familial assault of well-intentioned questions:
This is a good way to respond to just about any situation, but is particularly useful here. Many of your relatives may not understand (or fully appreciate) your artistic rendering of the iconic dance move. While they are momentarily overcome by confusion, you take the opportunity to hide under the dining room table. Foolproof.
Stop, drop and roll
There are so many hot takes coming your way that you are metaphorically on fire. Following the standard fire department-sanctioned procedure seems only appropriate and also allows you to inconspicuously escape the situation.
Take a big ‘ole bite of pumpkin pie
And then another. Don’t stop eating pumpkin pie. Ever. The perk of this option is that we know you would be doing this anyway, so now you’re just multi-tasking. Can you say time-management skills?
Turn to Kermit the Frog
Quickly review the Kermit the Frog memes you have saved on your camera roll to try and remember what your subconscious might advise you to do in situations such as this one.
Happy Holidays, Hoyas!! 4E is grateful for you wonderful people (and your blog views). Eat a lot of food, enjoy your family and remember to leave your textbooks at home! We’ll see you in Lau when you get back for another lovely semester.
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